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How to Talk About Death
Jancee Dunn Polls the Experts

Q: You've been out of touch with an old friend who's coming to town to catch up. You've just heard that her brother died a year ago. Do you bring it up at lunch? Pretend you don't know and wait for her to mention it?

A: "Bring it up. If she needs to talk, she'll value your offer. And if she's found her peace, she'll appreciate that you cared enough to ask."
Rushworth M. Kidder, founder of the Institute for Global Ethics

"When my mother died, I divided my friends into two categories: those who stepped up and bore witness to my pain and honored my mother's memory by asking me about my loss and, well, those who didn't. Be a friend who steps up. It's the only right thing to do."
Faith Salie, host of Fair Game from PRI with Faith Salie

From the February 2008 issue of O, The Oprah Magazine
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