Q: I just had a baby, and my divorced parents both want to spend Christmas at my house—but they can't stand each other. I'm not up for the job of referee. How do I decide who comes?
A: "This is why New Year's Day was invented. Schedule them into different ends of the holiday week, and hint that if they rise above their rancor for the sake of their new grandchild, maybe they can both spend the whole week next time."
— Rushworth M. Kidder, founder, the Institute for Global Ethics
"When someone throws a porcupine in your direction, it's always your decision whether to catch it or allow it to roll past you. Give your parents verbal visitation guidelines complete with dos, don'ts, and penalties for infractions. Also suggest hotels on opposite sides of town."
— Rudy Rasmus, pastor, St. John's United Methodist Church in Houston
We Hear You!