Although he does not want to share it with the world, Tony says talking to Dr. Hendrix helped and his communication with Wendie has improved. "It's productive communication now," Tony says. In addition, the couple say they have been arguing less in front of their daughter, Bailie. "It's been cut by about 85 percent," Tony says.
Dr. Hendrix tells Wendie and Tony to continue working on their relationship by removing what he says is one of the worst addictions of all—negativity."For one thing, it gives us some of our biggest highs and most sense of power," he says. "That has to go. Replace the negativity with curiosity. Replace it with compassion. Replace it with listening."
Dr. Hendrix also wants Wendie and Tony to continue practicing Imago, which he calls a portable therapy that needs to be practiced both in therapy sessions and at home. "They have a goal of having 21 days in which they do not experience a breakdown in their connection by using the dialogue process," Dr. Hendrix says. "Every time they break down, they've gone back to day number one until they get 21 days of repetition. There's some science in that—once you do anything 21 days, it begins to get integrated into your neural pathways."