Danny Bonaduce, a former child star who has survived his fair share of scandal, is now the co-host of Seattle's KZOK 102.5 morning radio show. Danny's morning-drive duties include playing "life coach" to callers who need help with everything from relationships to rehab. Now, Danny, a featured guest on
Oprah: Where Are They Now?, shares some of his best advice.From Danny...
If you're wondering what makes me a life coach, it's my attendance
at the school of hard knocks.
At the end of a very tough road, I have a beautiful wife, years of sobriety and a great job. It pleases me to know those
lessons weren't wasted on me, as they have been in the past.
Click here to find out more about The Danny Bonaduce Show, airing on Seattle's KZOK 102.5.The opinions, views and advice given by Danny Bonaduce are strictly his own.
- I got a call from a gentleman, who sounded like he had been
crying. His longtime girlfriend had broken up with him with no warning. His
question for the Life Coach was, "I'm afraid to get in a relationship
because I'm afraid of being left again. What should I do?" I had the
response at the ready. He didn't ask me how to find a new girlfriend. He asked
me how not to get left. The answer was simple. I told him, "When you find
a new girlfriend, treat her so good she would be crazy to leave you. That the
alternative to you would be sorely lacking. Let her know in a loving way that
the alternative to you is a huge step down." The reason I like this one so
much is that when I got home from work, I discovered that people had tweeted
and re-tweeted my advice, "Treat her so well she would be crazy to leave
you." I liked that.
- When I first saw this call on the monitor, I was a little nervous.
It started, "I'm a 12-year-old boy." That could be a bit sketchy. At
first, I thought I was in a perilous and precarious situation and easily could
have been. The young man said, "I'm 12 years old, and I think I might be
gay. What should I do?" I felt really good about my answer and the fact
that he would think to call me. I told him I thought he was in luck. He has
nothing but time and, in my opinion—and in a way, the opinion of the Supreme
Court—there's no wrong choice. If he thinks he might be gay, then by
definition, he thinks he might be straight. Don't rush into any permanent decision
before you're sure. But know this: A lot of people will be there to support
you, including me.
- I get a lot of calls like this one. A woman called up and said
that she had 6 months clean. She lived with her boyfriend, who was also in
recovery. She thought her boyfriend had recently relapsed and even noticed
money missing. My listeners and I have a very close relationship. I don't want
to say I shouted, but my volume definitely went up. Here was my answer: Run.
Then I asked her a couple of questions. Doesn't she know she's not supposed to
date anyone, let alone another addict, until she has a full year of sobriety?
There's a good reason for that. The one I've seen most is the addicts who are
in love make a pact to just get high tonight, just the two of them. Jump six
months ahead, and you'll see them with no teeth. Focus on your own recovery
until you have at least a year and that doesn't guarantee safety or success.
I've had a year at least three different times. Be good to yourself, think
through the decisions you make, and give me a call in a year. If you screw this
up, I'll yell at you when you call, but I'll still give you good advice.