Super Soul Sunday
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Posted: Fri 04/19/2013 08:00 AM
Vanity and pride are what most of us tend to think of when we think of ego, but ego is much more than an overinflated sense of self. It can also turn up in feelings of inferiority or self-hatred because ego is any image you have of yourself that gives you a sense of identity—and that identity derives from the things you tell yourself and the things other people have been saying about you that you've decided to accept as truth.
One way to think about ego is as a protective heavy shell, such as the kind some animals have, like a big beetle. This protective shell works like armor to cut you off from other people and the outside world. What I mean by shell is a sense of separation: Here's me and there's the rest of the universe and other people. The ego likes to emphasize the "otherness" of others.
This sense of separation is an intrinsic part of the ego. The ego loves to strengthen itself by complaining—either in thoughts or words—about other people, the situation you find yourself in, something that is happening right now but "shouldn't be," and even about yourself. For example, when you're in a long line at the supermarket, your mind might start complaining how slow the checkout person is, how he should be doing this or doing that, or he failed to do anything at all—including packing the bag of the person ahead of you correctly.
When this happens, the ego has you in its grip. You don't have thoughts; the thoughts have you—and if you want to be free, you have to understand that the voice in your head has created them and irritation and upset you feel is the emotional response to that voice Only in this way can you be present to the truer world around you and see the golden shade in a pound of pears on the scanner, or the delight of a child in line who begs to eat them.The trick, of course, is to work to free ourselves from this armor and from this voice that is dictating reality.
Learn how to break free of negative thoughts >>
Posted: Fri 04/19/2013 12:00 AM
Can you feel the inherent aliveness in your body? Can you feel that your hands are alive? Your legs? Your feet? Your arms? Most people are astonished when they recognize the spiritual energy in their physical body. But it’s a crucial realization to make, because this energy can take you out of your thinking mind.
Fortunately, it’s not difficult to feel this aliveness. To start, close your eyes and hold either your right or your left hand. Don’t touch anything. Just stay put, without moving your hand. Then, after a few moments, ask yourself, “How do I know whether my hand is still there or not?” With your eyes shut, the only way you can know it exists is by directing your attention to it. Once your attention is focused on your hand, you will feel suddenly feel the energy presence. Then you’ll begin to feel the energy in the rest of your body: your feet, your legs, you arms and everywhere. You’ll feel a global sense of aliveness.
This sense may resembling tingling, but it’s more subtle. What you’re feeling is that your entire body being alive with energy, and this energy is a portal to experiencing the present moment—the space in which all life unfolds and where is peace is found.
Posted: Wed 04/17/2013 08:00 AM
This Sunday, Oprah sits down with The New York Times best-selling author Eckhart Tolle to discuss his remarkable spiritual journey and their groundbreaking A New Earth webcasts. They will also answer viewers’ questions about living in the present moment.
Watch a preview today! Then, tune in Sunday at 11 a.m. ET/PT for the complete discussion on OWN.
Posted: Wed 04/17/2013 12:00 AM
Get Iyanla's thoughts on how to approach a difficult conversation that will advance, heal and grow your relationships in seven steps.
1. Acknowledge the fact that you need to have a hard conversation.
2. Clarify your expectations. Be clear with yourself about what your experience should be—and the intention should not be to get your point across or declare who is right. "It's not to have your toxic dump," Iyanla says. "It is to heal, grow or expand the relationship."
3. Invite the other person to have a conversation with you. "Say, 'There are some things going on I want to share with you. I'd like to have this conversation,'" Iyanla says. "If they say no, don't take it personally. Say, 'Can I check back with you in a week? When will you be ready? Because this is important.'"
4. Set the ground rules—especially if you think there's potential for upset. "Say, 'I want to share something with you. I ask you to just listen, and then if you want to respond, I'll listen,'" Iyanla says. "Let's not call names, let's not swear, throw things, whatever. No name-calling, whatever your ground rules might be."
Get the remaining three steps
Posted: Fri 04/12/2013 08:00 AM
Spiritual teacher Iyanla Vanzant says many people confuse guilt (a feeling that you've done something wrong) with shame (a sense that there's something wrong with who you are). Find out why Iyanla says both sentiments are wasted emotions. Plus, discover the three main reasons people feel guilty.
Tune in at 11 a.m. ET/PT on OWN or join our worldwide simulcast on Oprah.com, Facebook.com/OWNTV or Facebook.com/SuperSoulSunday.
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