Welcome to Oprah.com
|
Sign up for our
Newsletters!
|
Terms of Use
|
Privacy Policy
Subscribe to
O, The Oprah Magazine
OPRAH.COM
OPRAH'S NEXT CHAPTER
O MAGAZINE
OPRAH'S LIFECLASS
OWN TV
Home
Full Episodes
Videos
Shows
Schedule
Casting Call
Iyanla: Fix My Life
#FixMyLife
Iyanla, Fix My Life
Iyanla Fix My Life Episodes
Iyanla: Fix My Life Videos
The Work
Iyanla: Fix My Life Blog
About Iyanla: Fix My Life
The Work: "Fix My Absent Father"
Tweet
Pin It
Print
Of all human experiences, abandonment and rejection are among the most difficult to deal with because of the emotions they trigger. Anger, shame and guilt are the most common emotions that surge to the surface when there is an experience of abandonment or rejection. In many instances, where there is one, there is the other. An experience of abandonment gives rise to feelings of rejection. When a person is overtly or covertly rejected by a loved one, family member, partner or even a social acquaintance, it registers in the mind as an experience of abandonment. For children, nothing is more devastating or damaging than the feeling of being abandoned by a parent or primary caregiver. In this week's episode, we look into the lives of four young adults, who were abandoned by both parents as a result of those caregivers' struggle with substance abuse.
This study guide is offered to support you as you work through your feelings of abandonment or rejection. As you complete the statements, stay focused on you, your thoughts and your motivations, even if other people are involved. As you open your heart and mind to compassionately acknowledge what you have done or not done, you open the door for healing, learning and growth.
Note: When you're done adding your entry, click 'Save' below. You will be able to edit your workbook at any point.
Edit
1
ABANDONMENT
Instructions: Please complete the following statements. You are encouraged to work with one person or experience at a time and to examine any experience where you believe you were abandoned.
2
I believe ________ abandoned me. When I think about this experience, I feel ________.
3
If ______ had not abandoned me, I believe I would _____________.
4
As a result of this experience of abandonment, it is difficult for me to ______________.
5
As a result of feeling abandoned by ______, I promised myself I would________.
6
As a result of feeling abandoned by ________, I always _______________.
7
If _____ had not abandoned me, my life would be ______ because ______________.
8
What I want ______ to know is ____________________.
9
What I am willing to do to heal from this experience is _______________.
10
Another way to look at this experience would be ________________.
11
The person who could say that he or she felt abandoned by me is _____________.
12
What I want this person to know is ________________.
13
FORGIVENESS
Instructions: For this part of the exercise, complete each or any statement as many times as necessary to clear the emotions that come forward.
14
I am willing to forgive myself for believing ____________. I am willing to forgive myself for feeling ____________.
15
I am willing to forgive myself for thinking ____________.
16
I am willing to forgive myself for saying ____________.
17
I am willing to forgive myself for not ____________.
18
I am willing to forgive myself for always ____________.
19
SELF-APPRECIATION
Instructions: You are encouraged to complete each of the statements below for closure.
20
Even though I believe I was abandoned by _____, what I appreciate about myself is ______. Even though I believe I was abandoned by _____, what I know about myself is __________.
21
Even though I believe I was abandoned by _____, what I appreciate about myself is _______.
22
Even though I believe I was abandoned by _____, what I believe about myself is _________.
23
Even though I believe I was abandoned by _____, what I appreciate about myself is ______.
24
As a result of feeling abandoned by ________, I always _______________.
25
Even though I believe I was abandoned by _____, what I appreciate about myself is _______.
26
Even though I believe I was abandoned by _____, what I am willing to do better is ________.
27
Even though I believe I was abandoned by _____, what I appreciate about myself is _______.
Please check the box below if you’d like your answers to be shared with our producers. If you don’t check the box your information will be still be saved and can be accessed by logging in to your Oprah.com account:
I agree that my answers above and related materials (including my username and email) may be shared with OWN and Harpo producers. I understand that I may be contacted by a producer in relation to a future OWN show.
Published on
October 12, 2012
Advertisement
Share Your Story
Do you need Iyanla's help resolving a conflict?
Is your family in total chaos?
Are you a mom recently released from jail?
Leading a double-life?
Need help ending a toxic friendship/relationship?
Estranged from your loved one?
Successful and now supporting your family?
In the middle of a nasty divorce?
Family in Total Chaos and Need Iyanla's Help?
Is A Loved One Struggling With Addiction?
Grandparent Raising a Grandchild?
Are you always the other woman?
Tired of feuding with your in-laws?
Do you want your out of control teen to come home?
Do you need Iyanla's help dealing with betrayal?
Single Women: Struggling to Find Love?
See more »
Advertisement
Advertisement
Read an Excerpt
Start reading Iyanla Vanzant's book,
Peace from Broken Pieces
, and order your copy today!
Go