Falling in love is one of the most exciting things that can happen to a person.
But staying in love isn't always so exciting... at least, according to common knowledge.
However, long-term lovers are in luck! A 2009 study released by Stony Brook University suggests that passion isn't a limited resource. Scientists at the university scanned the brains of couples who had been together for 20 years and compared the findings to the brain activity of newfound lovers.
The long-term lovers had similar MRI activity in the regions of the brain that new lovers had. Previously, it was thought that this stimulation might dwindle, or even cease entirely, once lovers had been together for a while. Fortunately, we were wrong long-term passion and excitement is possible, both emotionally and chemically speaking.
However, even the most experienced of lovers need a refresher course in passion every once in a while. If your bedroom feels as cold and grey as the weather, here are some easy ways to breathe passion back into your relationship:
Make intimacy a part of your daily life. If you want more passion in your relationship, you need to help create it. Do so by implementing more touch and sexual contact. Institute make-out sessions again, such as in the back row of the movies or in front of the T.V. Rub his leg seductively under the table when you are out to dinner. Grab his hand and pull him in for a kiss when he least expects it. All of these little moments of passion were frequent and unplanned early on in your relationship, but if you make a conscious plan to bring them back, it will be just as passionate and sexy as it was the first time!
Take a vacation...sort of. When on vacation, it is easy to disassociate yourself from roles like "parent," "employee," etc. and tap into your natural sexiness. However, in our down economy, flying to a beach isn't feasible for most couples. Don't fret. Send the kids to Grandma's house and turn your house into a vacation spot. Make summery, sensual cocktails like mojitos and rum punch, play a little island music, pump up the heat a little bit, and change in to your sexiest swimwear. You will love the sensation of baring skin in the middle of winter, and you don't even have to worry about sun damage...or about nosy onlookers!
Pretend like it's the very first time. Meet your partner out at a bar or a restaurant. Wear something scandalous and sexy, something he has never seen before. You could even try a wig, eyelash extensions, or dramatic makeup. When you see him at the bar, approach him and ask him if you can sit down. Play a role you have always wanted to be (a dangerous femme fatale, an innocent Southern belle, etc.), and let your imaginations run wild. By time you two get home, you will feel like you are being intimate with each other (or your characters) for the very first time!