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After successfully completing a 52-day inpatient treatment program, Salina says she's had the "urge to purge" only once in seven months. "I don't even want to go back to that," she says. "I just think it's disgusting. ... Just going into my closet every day is kind of like, 'Oh, my God, what did I do? How gross.'"

After years of hiding the severity of her disease from her husband, she's also working on rebuilding trust in her marriage. Neal says he was shocked to learn his wife was vomiting as many as three times a day. "[When I found out] I felt like, 'Man, how can I be so stupid?'" he says. "Even though I should trust her and know that she's [no longer binging and purging], I still watch."

Salina says she understands his motives, but Neal still feels like he betrayed his wife by exposing her deadly secret. "I did it because I love Salina, and I wanted to protect her," he says. "I didn't want her to be embarrassed. I didn't want her to feel like everybody's coming down on her."
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FROM: The Mom Afraid to Touch Her Own Children
Published on October 19, 2006

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