If her husband was cheating, Faith says she'd want to know. "I would say, 'Look, your husband propositioned me. This makes me feel uncomfortable. But more concerning, I'm worried what it means for you.'"
Randy says in talking to your friend, you may be forcing them to admit something they aren't ready to face. "When I took up questions related to this [in my column] ... I found that half the people want to know because they want to know what their spouse is up to. Half don't because they may know and you force them to confront something formally."