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Since Mariah writes many of her own songs, her lyrics are often very personal. In the song "Side Effects" on her album E=MC², Mariah opens up about her relationship with her ex-husband. "When I [sing] 'Kept my tears inside because I knew if I started, I'd keep crying for the rest of my life with you,' that's the truth," she says. "If I would have been emotionally present, then it would have been over for me...I had to be blocked."
Mariah says part of the problem was getting married before she was ready. "The song was not about mudslinging toward him. It's from my point of view," she says. "Really I'm just talking about my feelings during a particular time in my life."
Although the relationship has ended, Mariah says there are things she can take away from it. "It taught me that I had to allow myself to feel worthy of being loved and not just live vicariously through success."
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