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Denise and Chris met two and a half years ago and seemed to have the same perfect vision of their future together. They moved in together and talked about marriage and having kids. But after six months, Chris told Denise, "I love you, but I have to break up with you." Three days later, he said he wanted to get back together. Then, two weeks after that he said, "I love you, but I'm not sure I'm in love with you." Chris isn't sure there's enough "fireworks" in their relationship and Denise doesn't know how to read his mixed messages.

Greg says a guy's not into you if you're waiting for him to commit. "If he's unsure, then he's unsure, and that's an answer—unsure is 'no,'" says Greg. "The phrase 'I love you, but I'm not in love with you' really is this. The first 'I love you' means, 'I don't want to hurt you.' The second one means, 'I'm not in love with you.' That's bad news. 'I'm not in love with you' is 'I'm not in love with you.' Like, you have to sort of take people at their word, especially when they're telling you. [Chris] is doing his thing. He's telling you who he is. You have to decide if you're okay with that. If you are, awesome. If not, you have to do what's best for Denise."
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FROM: He's Just Not That Into You
Published on September 22, 2004

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