Dan says his wife doesn't like to kiss him
One of the biggest obstacles in Shayne and Dan's sex life is that Shayna doesn't like kissing, she says. "It makes me feel repulsed," she says. "It makes me feel disgusted, and it makes my skin crawl."

Perhaps not surprisingly, Dan has started to take this personally. "It makes me wonder sometimes if it is me—if she's just not into me, or if she's not turned on by me anymore or if I'm lacking somewhere," Dan says. "Foreplay consists of Shayna having her vibrator and me sitting there pretty much waiting till she's ready to have sex."

Since Shayna doesn't particularly like having sex, she says she'll barter for it. "If I give her a massage, she'll have sex," Dan says. Shayna says she also trades household chores—making their three children's sandwiches, filling the gas tank—for sex. "It's like, if I have to do a chore, then you have to do a chore." 

Dan says his wife's attitude makes him question himself. "I don't know if it's my looks or something I did to her," he says.
FROM: In the Bedroom: Sex Therapy with Dr. Laura Berman
Published on April 08, 2010


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