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Anderson says that he doesn't believe that Carter had planned to take his life. Carter left no suicide note, and didn't make any indications at the time that he was considering suicide.

"You keep asking that question—'Why?'" Anderson says. "Finally you have to get to a place where sometimes there isn't any why. Sometimes there just is. We probably will never know exactly what it was that went through his mind, but I do think he wasn't himself."

Instead, Anderson is left to speculate. "I think he was depressed over time about a breakup and I think he didn't really communicate with a lot of people in his life," he says.

In speaking with his mom, Anderson says he gained some insight into his brother's tragic decision. "She reminded me of him asking that question, 'Will I ever feel again?' I realized I had been searching for feeling for years and, you know, I just happened to deal with it in a different way than he did."
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FROM: CNN's Anderson Cooper Reveals His Family Secrets
Published on May 23, 2006

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