Make a list of all the things about yourself and your life that you believe would be different if you had a father.
Iyanla says that once you've made your list, you need to forgive that life—and let it go.
What would you want your father to know about how he broke your heart?
What would you tell your father—if he were here—about who you are?
The role of a father is to be proud of his son, provide for him, show him how to be a man. Who did (or does) that for you?
Many fatherless sons stay angry; it's easier than focusing on being abandoned. Iyanla says if you can't get to the hurt, you can't get to forgiveness. Looking beyond your anger, describe the pain you feel.
Printed from Oprah.com on Thursday, December 12, 2013