Many people dream about finding their "soul mate," the person who will sweep them off their feet and make their life complete. Dr. Oz talks with Kathy Freston, author of The One: Discovering the Secrets of Soul Mate Love, about the unpredictable power of attraction and how to create that soulful relationship.
According to Kathy, a true soul mate comes not from a romance novel, but from chemistry. "[It's] actually someone we're drawn to irresistibly," she says. "You're drawn to this person in such a way that you simply cannot turn from it—something is happening on such a soulful level." That person may not fit the physical image you have for a partner, but Kathy believes there's a reason for every relationship. "We attract into our lives the very kind of energy we need to experience in order to grow," she explains.
There can also be more than one soul mate for a person, Kathy says, and they can serve different purposes. Sometimes that powerful attraction can lead to a relationship full of drama, and that person may not be someone to spend your life with. Other times, no matter how powerful the attraction, people grow out of each other and the relationship ends. The important thing, Kathy says, is to realize that you are "the one"—only then can you find a more fulfilling, soulful relationship.
Ultimately, it's all about growth, Kathy says. When you refuse to grow, you're doomed to repeat the same kinds of relationships again and again. The easy path is to stay in that comfortable place where you don't have to face your inner self, but you won't be fulfilled. "To live a deep and soulful life, we have to take risks," Kathy says. "[We have to] expose ourselves, connect with someone and meet our partner with an openness that we normally wouldn't show."
Printed from Oprah.com on Wednesday, December 11, 2013