Are you constantly comparing yourself to other parents? Do you always wonder if you've done something wrong? Rabbi Shmuley says we live in a society that invites constant comparison and, in a desire to be perfect, people actually become imperfect.
What happens when you try to be the perfect parent is that you bring an unrealistic standard into your home that no one can live up to, Rabbi Shmuley says. Nothing is ever good enough and, as a result, you raise your children to feel stressed, under pressure and unable to forgive themselves for being human, Rabbi Shmuley says. "The healthy parents are the ones who show their humanity. Humanity is found in the struggle and hard work," he says.
Rabbi Shmuley shares advice on how to be a better, more human parent.
Understand that your humanity is a blessing. "You being fallible means that you're empathetic," he says. "When people make mistakes—especially your kids—be understanding of that."
Be there for your children when they make mistakes. Guide them and help them learn from those mistakes, Rabbi Shmuley says.
Accept the fact that you're going to make errors as a parent. "You can't succeed all of the time," he says. "Just do the best you can."
Be aware of what people really admire about each other—humanity. We still love people when they get frustrated and make mistakes and, likewise, people will still love you when you trip up too, Rabbi Shmuley says.
"Imperfection is overrated. It creates false standards, and it's an outright rejection of our humanity. It's never good to make our kids feel like failures. Remember, it is far better to have a human household filled with light and laughter than one filled with so-called 'perfect people.'"
Printed from Oprah.com on Friday, December 13, 2013