Every month Lisa Kogan addresses readers of O, The Oprah Magazine with her column, Lisa Tells All. Gayle talks with Lisa about her June 2007 column , which focuses on getting through tough times and not constantly whining and complaining. "Occasionally a good whine is necessary, it is needed even," she says. However, Lisa says whining too much can drive your friends, family and even complete strangers mad!
To avoid the temptation to complain, Lisa says she has come up with a few ways to calm herself. "I ask myself a couple of questions, [such as], 'Does the word Darfur appear anywhere in my address?'" she says. By realizing that things could be much worse, Lisa says she is less tempted to whine about her troubles. If that tactic doesn't help shake her cranky attitude, Lisa says she gives into the idea that "things could be so much better." That plan usually involves writing a permission slip that Lisa says allows her to lie in bed and eat bacon bits all day with the shades drawn.
While Lisa says eating large amounts of pork can be comforting, she believes the true way to get out of a funk is to figure out what is really going on in your life that is making you crabby. Lisa says when she is feeling undervalued or treated unfairly, she often feels the urge to whine. "It's really debilitating to see your self-worth through somebody else's eyes—it has got to come from inside," she says.
It is important to realize that "a rose is not its thorns, a peach is not its fuzz and a human being is not his or her crankiness," she says. In addition, she says that you should always treat people with respect, even when you are upset and impatient, because everyone matters. "Everybody wants to matter, and guess what? Everybody does," Lisa says.