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Accepting Compliments

Oprah.com   |   July 21, 2008
Rabbi Shmuley
Many people have a difficult time accepting a compliment. Perhaps you have low self-esteem, feel obligated to live up to a higher standard or feel like you owe someone a compliment in return. Rabbi Shmuley says if you don't accept compliments, people will stop giving them. He offers remedies to help you to accept people's positive feedback:




  • Force yourself not to react negatively to a compliment. "Learn to just let [people] say it," Rabbi Shmuley says. Practice being passive about it.
  • Be thankful. Instead of shunning a compliment, learn to give thanks and appreciate the kind words.
  • Reflect on why you cannot accept a compliment. Rabbi Shmuley says he too has trouble accepting them because he sometimes feels he's not special.
  • Give compliments too. The more you practice giving them, the easier it becomes to receive them, Rabbi Shmuley says.
  • Learn to give yourself compliments.

Today's Shmuleyism
"A compliment is the human manifestation of appreciation for another. Therefore, when we reject a compliment, we reject our own virtue because it's not believable to us. When someone offers a compliment, be passive and just accept it. Let it swell your heart, and pass the compliment on."
Printed from Oprah.com on Friday, May 24, 2013
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