Jerry: I hope so. I'm going to work on it more now—especially since this comes from the leader of the pack! How often does a woman need to know she's appreciated?
Oprah: She just needs to know it, period. It's not a one-time statement. It's ongoing foreplay.
Jerry: So the foundation of appreciation has to be there, and then the little things highlight that appreciation.
Oprah: Yes. Are you romantic?
Jerry: We've started e-mailing each other. At the end of mine, I tell Jess how much I love her. She likes that, especially since she's not used to getting e-mails from me.
Oprah: And especially considering how you feel about BlackBerrys! Do you like being married?
Jerry: I love being married. But I would never want to be married to anyone else, so I can't say I like marriage. I love my wife.
Oprah: What do you love most about her?
Jerry: I just always want to be with her. Even if she's talking to someone on the phone, I want to be there. I enjoy her around-ness. I'll go into her office and just sit. I wonder if she thinks, "What is he doing here?" I'm interested, stimulated; I just like watching her live her life. Quincy Jones had that fantastic line about being with his friend Ray Charles: "It was just good air."
Oprah: Yes—I love that. On the subject of memorable quotes, I've heard that you're one of the most sought-after public speakers at college commencements.
Jerry: Really? I didn't know that. I seldom do it. Tony Bennett, one of my heroes, asked me to speak at the first commencement for a high school for performing arts in New York. So I wrote a speech, and it actually turned out to be pretty good.
Oprah: What's the essence of what you said?
Jerry: I gave them my three rules for living. First, bust your ass. That's a universal law, no matter what you do. Second, pay attention. Learn from everything and everyone all the time. One of my favorite expressions is "Wherever you look, there's something to see." Finally, I gave them my third rule: Fall in love. Fall in love with your street, your tennis game, a pillow.
Jerry: Exactly. You can be passionate about anything. Someone could say, "I love this fork," and I'd think that was great. Pay attention; don't let life go by you. Fall in love with the back of your cereal box.
Oprah: Last question: What do you know for sure?
Jerry: That you are one cool cat.
Oprah: I think you're the coolest. I've learned so much from you today. You're the kind of person I could be friends with.
Jerry: The door is open.
Oprah: Come on over!