Q. A friend occasionally e-mails my husband. She recently mentioned a grudge she has against me—from ten years ago. He told me, I confronted her, and now she's angry at him. Honestly, isn't it unrealistic to expect spouses to keep secrets from each other?

A. It's not only unrealistic, it's wrong. Marriages are grounded in trust. Asking one partner to keep secrets from the other threatens that trust. Your husband did the right thing (but first he should have told your friend he was going to do it). — Jack Marshall, president of ProEthics