Q: I agreed to build a website for a friend for free. She's always asking me to update it. She doesn't seem to appreciate how much time it takes. How can I gracefully explain she needs to pay me or hire someone else?
A: "The best way to handle it is with transparency: 'This is awkward for me to say because we're friends, but I wonder if you'd be able to pay me a bit. I totally understand if that feels uncomfortable and would be happy to recommend someone else.' If she doesn't ante up, you might want to update the site with that bachelorette party photo of her dancing with the Thunder from Down Under."
— Faith Salie, host of public radio's Fair Game from PRI with Faith Salie
"She may not realize how much of your time is required. Does your friend have special skills that you can benefit from? Tell her that you're happy to help her but because site maintenance can be an ongoing project, you'll have to charge her. Or try to come up with a barter arrangement where you benefit from each other's talents."
— Lisa Caputo, chairman and CEO of Citi's Women & Co.
From the September 2008 issue of O, The Oprah Magazine
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