Jancee Dunn Polls the Experts Q: What should you say when an overweight friend obesses about her weight? As in, "Of course, I can't wear this dress. I'm too fat, right?"
A: "Your easy, immediate impulse is to dismiss her self-condemnation by saying, 'Shut up—you are so skinny!' or 'You just need your eyebrows shaped—that always takes off ten pounds.' Resist that impulse. Put the medicine ball in her court by saying, 'You're not "too fat," but I totally understand what it's like not to feel good about yourself. What do you think would make you feel more confident?" —Faith Salie, host of the public radio show Fair Game from PRI with Faith Salie
"Say nothing. People usually know the answer to most of the questions they ask. Your friend needs to know that you're really a friend regardless of her size, and that you'll protect her heart and her dignity."
— Pastor Rudy Rasmus, pastor of St. John's United Methodist Church in Houston
Printed from Oprah.com on Wednesday, December 11, 2013