Many people have some aspects of their lives they feel need attention—be it their career, relationships, finances or personal passions. Jean talks with Kimberly Fulcher, founder, president and CEO of Compass Life and Business Designs, about her personal journey of becoming a life coach and how you can benefit from many of the lessons life coaches teach.
Kimberly is a successful businesswoman, wife and mother of four who sold her online software business for nearly $40 million during the dot-com boom. While her life may have looked picture prefect on the outside, Kimberly says she was miserable inside. "I was running on a treadmill, going through the motions, doing everything I thought I was supposed to be doing and yet completely disconnected from what was important to me and what I really wanted in my life," she says.
With the goals of focusing on her family and a finding a passion in life at the top of her list, Kimberly says sought out the help of a life coach. She soon began transforming her life and started her own life-coaching company, Compass Life and Business Designs. "My purpose, very clearly, specific to my "life compass," is to really help wake women up to what they are capable of," she says. "[We find out] what their strengths are and then provide them with the tools that they can use to not only to have a happier life but to really work toward and focus on the kind of contribution they want to make," she says.
Kimberly says there are five life-coaching tips you can use to start creating a more fulfilling life today:
"No" is a complete sentence. "Not only do you have the right to say no, but when you do, you don't necessarily need to move through a long, drawn out explanation as to why you can't comply with a request," Kimberly says.
Balance is a myth. "There is no such thing as living in equal segments in the pie of your life," she says. "One day, your career is going to need all of your time. On another day, your family is—that's okay."
Take the gloves off. "Stop beating yourself up," Kimberly says. "What is right for you, in your own life—you already know it in your gut—that is the right way for you to live your life."
Get some perspective. "When you are getting upset about something, [ask yourself], 'Is this going to matter when I'm 80?'" she says. "Nine times out of 10, it's just not." For example, Kimberly says you shouldn't be upset when you're held up in traffic and late for an appointment. That isn't nearly as important as missing out on a chance to connect with your child, she says.
Put yourself on your own list. "You've got to take care of yourself if you want to have a great career, if you want to succeed financially, if you want to have a great relationship," she says. "You must first take care of the woman who you are. To take care of yourself is really the most selfless thing you can do ...when you're good, everything else is better."
Printed from Oprah.com on Sunday, December 8, 2013