Put Your Strengths to Work

Six months after Marcus's workshop, Vanessa says her life has completely changed. "I'm spending more and more time with my daughter. We're taking swimming lessons. I turn the computer off at 5. I've also managed to focus on my strengths, embrace them," she says. Marcus says Vanessa has a desire to please, which is a skill that is often construed as a weakness. "That strength of hers to be able to woo people over and win them over, that's not a weakness," he says.

Now, the first person Vanessa says yes to is herself. "Saying no finally feels good. It empowers me," she says. " Once you're personally happy, everything else is kind of easy after that."