You're Ordering the Wrong Vodka
Allen has noticed that if he orders a vodka tonic, a waiter will often ask, "'Would you like Grey Goose or Belvedere?'—as if those are the only two choices." The truth is, if you're having a mixed drink, you don't necessarily need a premium spirit, and having your drink made with whatever is in the well—bartender-speak for 'non-fancy liquor'—is an easy way to lower your drinks bill. The well (also called the house pour) might be Absolut or Smirnoff, which are both perfectly fine mixed with tonic or juice but cost about two-thirds less.