Oprah: And you no longer get to make mistakes that are just your own. For years I've said to Gayle, "All my mistakes show up on the 6 o'clock news." As now do yours. Have you and Lisa been in the tabloids yet?
Dr. Oz: Not really. So far, you're the only one I've had an affair with!
Oprah: Well, that makes sense because Gayle's having an affair with Stedman [laughs].
Dr. Oz: Again?
Oprah: Mm-hmm. So now that you're doing the show, do you feel yourself pulled in every direction?
Dr. Oz: I do. It's a big issue for me—feeling like I should be helping every person who asks for something or who has a problem.
Oprah: You've got to learn to say no. May I say that to you?
Dr. Oz: Yes, thank you.
Oprah: You have to set boundaries. Years ago, during a mammogram, I was leaning over with my breast in the machine, and the technician said, "Excuse me, I know it's a bad time, but..." I'm thinking, You're damn right it's a bad time!
Dr. Oz: That is very funny.
Oprah: No hyperbole! And I don't want that kind of thing to happen to you, okay? Okay. Now, we all know you as "America's Doctor." Would you give yourself the same grade as a doctor that you would as a husband?
Dr. Oz: I think I'm a better doctor than I am a husband. I give myself a good grade as a doctor, then the next best grade as a father, and the worst grade as a husband. I don't listen well when Lisa talks.
Oprah: As well as I've tried to teach you?!
Dr. Oz: The reason she wrote Us is that after 25 years of me not listening to pillow talk, she figured if she wrote it down, maybe I'd read it and believe it.
Oprah: For anyone who isn't familiar with it, we should explain that Us is Lisa's 2010 book about transforming your relationships. Did you learn a lot about yourself reading that book?
Dr. Oz: Lisa asked me to write the foreword—but I wasn't allowed to read the book till it was done. She thought I'd mess it up. When she finally gave it to me, I sat there and read the whole thing, cover to cover. I wish I had understood the things she was telling me all along.
Oprah: What did you learn from the book? I learned that y'all have a very hot sex life!
Dr. Oz: That's how most men connect—in bed. The physical connection is important because it reinforces the emotional one. But what I learned most from the book is that Lisa is all about having a relationship with me. I would not be sitting here having this conversation if it weren't for Lisa. It was her idea to do the Second Opinion show, which is where you and I met. It was her idea to do the books that gave rise to that show. It was her vision early on to create the kind of show we're doing now. She had a much larger vision for me than I did for myself.
Oprah: I usually say that about God! You say it about Lisa.
Dr. Oz: Believe me, I do. But anyway, we actually had a big spat about this a couple of months ago.
Oprah: You two have spats?
Dr. Oz: Oh, gosh. In my house, the prosecution never rests. It's just one after another of things I do wrong. And I do do them wrong. But she's quick to make sure I own up to it. Anyway, a couple of months ago we were fighting about something, and she said, "Don't you understand? I didn't do any of those things so you could go off and make a television show on your own. I did those things so I could be with you! It was all about building connection in our life together. Because when you're in the operating room, I can't be close to you."
Oprah: Everybody wants to marry a doctor, but it's a lonely life.
Dr. Oz: Medicine is a jealous mistress. It demands all your time. That's why Lisa's involved in all the other things I do. And the wonderful part is, I trust her judgment more than anyone else's. She has become my true north. She's so insightful about the things I do—especially the dumb ones!
Next: "You've got to make a conscious decision that you'll create balance"
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