Find a good friend or family member who will support you no matter what and start saying "No" to the things you dont want to do. Balance helps.....but that means someone will have to hear the word no from you. And dont feel guilty...you are a great mother no doubt !

Tahnks for the advice, that post was a 'I can't sleep, up at night frustration post' I'm sure I'll survive.

I feel the same way. I have spent the last few years caring for my husband my 2 kids and and my ailing parents who moved in with us. And in turn have gained 30 pounds. I feel overwhelmed at times but what can you do they all need to be feed and have clean clothes. The homework has to get finished and they have to make the doctor appointments. I have talked to friends but they don't understand they suggest going out to the movies or dinner, that doesn't help. The issues are still there when I return. So I have turned to junk food for relief or security and as I stepped on the scale this year that junk food is just another issue I need to work on. I wish I had a suggestion but if it is any consolation you are not only

Thank you for your response. It helps to know that I am not the only one out there who doesn't have it all together. So many times I look around and it seems to me that everyone seems to live the perfect life with everything all in a row and I just can't seem to get there. I have four beautiful children who are a great joy in my life and 98% of the time I adore everything about them. It's the 2% of the time that I feel like life is just going too fast. They are growing up before my eyes and I just want things to slow down a little. I guess it is just the rush of the holiday season. Thank God life will return to normal now that all the Christmas craziness is over. I am setting my goals this year with Oprah to concentrate on what is truly important and forget about trying so hard to be perfect. I'm too tired to try anymore. I wish you luck and perhaps things will slow down if we slow down ourselves.:0)

Truth be told - I think more of us feel like that than not. Don't be fooled - no one has their act completely together and if they think they do, they are just fooling themselves. I have three young boys and am a working mom - I feel your pain! I will say, however, that this holiday season was probably one of my favorites in a long time. Last February on my birthday, my world came crashing down. Ever since, I have been trying to work through a myriad of relationship and personal issues.

One of the blessings that God has graced me with out of my nightmare was the realization that I was living a co-dependant life and had lost myself. I could relate when Bob told Oprah that she had lost her zest/ her spark. I know I had. I was simply trying to hang on and get through my day, balance our family's over-extended schedule, and keep everyone happy. What I didn't realize is that noone was going to be happy with me playing the martyr and failing miserably in trying to do so (most especially me!).

In November, my husband and I agreed that we would take a 3-month sabattical from commitments - that's right, no sports, scouts, out-of-town travel, or any other commitments would be initiated or excepted out of obligation (or even interest if if would put stress on our family). We, have however, still made a few commitments like attending a parenting conference together, indivdual girls and guys night outs, and special dates out with our family and friends. The difference is, that we now get to choose what we do on a more flexible basis without long-term or even seasonal commitments hanging over our heads. Just remember, we all have choices and lots of great options on how to spend our time. But, when we overextend ourselves, we feel like we're victims in our own lives rather than being the shining star God intended for us to be.

I have also begun to embrace the Commandment about observing the Sabbath. I'm not sure God was talking specifically about Sundays but even God rested when he created the world, and afterall...we are created in His image.

A very dear friend of mine is a life coach and she has this wonderful (and sometimes annoying) habit of asking me one important question whenever I am overwhelmed or overstressed..."What is it you need?" Have you asked yourself that lately? Try to ask yourself that each and every day until it becomes ingrained in your head. I smile when I hear Kerry's voice pop in my head almost automatically now when I get stressed. Remember, "you must first put the oxygen mask on yourself and then you will be able to help others."

Best of luck on your journey! Rest assured that none of us know the answers except for God. Let him carry you for a while.

God Bless,

CSB4God

PS: If you are a reader, you may want to check out the book Beyond Co-Dependancy or Co-Dependancy No more - both excellent reads!

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. Your words make a lot of sense to me and I am going to make an effort to scale back. It sounds like you have found some peace in this crazy world and that is truly wonderful. Tahnk you again and take care.