No, I don't think you are crazy at all.....heartbreak from finding out you have been lied to does a number on trust....I would suggest you go to counseling and talk about this....our pasts do have a way of haunting us...and we often pattern our lives, unconciously, to set up the same scenario over and over until we learn why.

Dear Marcy,

I know exactly what you're going through, and i do know what it feels like. I believe it would help you to go and talk to someone about it, but before you do so, i would advise you to talk about it to your actual boyfriend. By my experience, if he really loves you, he will help you and support you. You know, you're not alone in this relationship, and you can ask him too for advise, explaining how you feel, and trying to show him that you need some help, he could per example being more open by telling you what he's doing of his days....so you don't get "paranoid" if you see what i mean. I do trust that everything will go well. Talk to him and find the strength in your heart to get rid of all these past demons that haunt you, ignore them, blow them away as they would only make your present harder to stand...

Good Luck

Trust is everything, not only in love relationships, in every area of ones life. Hurt often hinders us from trust that we place in others after it has been touched or tainted. The Atheist within The Christian Revealed: By Regina N Sanford. You will not believe what is in this book and what it touches on. You will see some of what you have touched on, in your own subject blog... Love will always love again. Don't stop:) Past, Present & Future. bogesey