I suggest that first of all you look after yourself. Please remember that I have Bipolar disease. People with bipolar will not listen to anyone. Once you are safe, you can begin to talk to him. Perhaps a minister or a councilor can help you find the right words. Someone with untreated bipolar is like an untreated alcoholic. They will hurt everyone around them until they come to the realization that they need help. It sounds as if your mate is acting abusively and violently and you need to look after yourself (and any children you may have) first and foremost.

My brother was recently diagnosed with
Bi-Polar disorder. He has tried taking medication, and it worked well
for a while...until he started refusing to take it. My question is: Do
you think it is necessary to force medication on people suffering
severely from this disorder? I know it would turn him back into my
brother if he would just take the medication. Here is a letter my
mother wrote to his doctor and I believe it is a great example of the
concerns of a mother.

August 9, 2007

Dear Dr. (omitted),

There are several things I
need to let you know about my son, (omitted), before he comes to his
appointment with you tomorrow, Friday, August 10, at 4:30 (hopefully, he will
be there).

The potentially good news
first- the University of (omitted) has been absolutely wonderful about allowing him to transfer there and only
complete 9 hours in the Fall and 6 hours in the Spring in order to receive a
Bachelor of Science Degree in Physical Education. The courses he will be taking are Anatomy,
Intro to Physical Education, and Business Statistics I in the fall
semester. For the spring, he will have
English Comp II and 3 one-hour P. E. classes.
The main challenge, of course, will be his mental health, and I am not
sure how the business statistics will be for him. We will get a tutor if needed.

The main reason I used the
word “potential” is that he has completely stopped taking all of his
medication. As of when, I really don’t know.
After having an even more extensive period of on-line gambling and
making applications for all kinds of credit cards and being, once again,
overdrawn on his new account set up about a month ago, he has declared that he
is taking care of things his way and that does not involve taking medication.

Just to give you an idea of
the severity of his on-line gambling, he used my credit card for approximately
$3800.00. We paid that, cancelled our
card, and this week we found that he had been trying to use our new card and we
have cancelled it now. Also, for some
unknown reason, when Arvest reopened an account in his name after a disastrous experience
a few months ago where we paid hundreds of dollars in overdraft charges, they
said he qualified for a Visa Gold card and sent it to him in the mail. Within 10 days of his first charge, the card
was completely maxed out at $5,000.00.
We will not be paying this for him.

The Univeristy of (omitted) is a private
school and is very expensive. He, in his
mind, is sure he can finish his degree and says he is ready. I asked him if he planned on just “flipping a
switch” to become responsible and productive, and he said “you are being
sarcastic, but that is really what I am doing.”

I hope you can help him. My husband and I just don’t know what to
do. We desperately want to believe that
he can do this, but I just really thought the Depakote was going to be a big
part of the answer. I noticed a huge
change during the time I knew he was taking it.
The Adderrall XR, he claimed, was at too low of a dose so he just
doubled up and ran out 12 or 15 days early for the past two months. He just seems like he does something weird
with it, taking too much at a time, etc.

Please help us understand
more about Bipolar disorder and how it applies to (omitted). Also, is he just inclined to do everything
negative to excess?

I know you can’t reveal
specifics to me, but I really need more information than I have found on the
internet.

Thank you so much for
continuing to work with (omitted).

Sincerely,

lolly,

I, too, am a mother of a young child with bipolar. My 8 year old was diagnosed last year. I understand your desire for more information on the subject. The doctors that we visited could not tell us much about the disease. Luckily I had access and time to search the internet and found several answers myself. We have had an amazing turn around. Our little girl went from raging, scratching at the walls, and screaming at the voices in her head - to living a normal life. We are using a natural approach - no medicines! I couldn't believe it worked, but I'm forever thankful. It involves a multi vitamin and mineral supplement from a company called Truehope. I would love to share more with you if you are interested. Best of wishes.

Hi there....
It may not be my place....you can take from this what you want....I just felt that I should reach out even though it's tough to admit this stuff! I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder almost 9 yrs ago after getting married, having Brain surgery & loosing one of my best friends to cancer.
Please if you sincerely felt any sort of connection to any of the stories shared.....Listen...2 years ago, I was saying exactly the same thing...."I turned to God" unfortunately "God" wasn't there to fix me in the middle of a manic episode. Although if you asked me I was having the most unbelievable Spiritual experience... Now I know it wasn't God
I'm grateful that my episode didn't get any where near what this woman experienced, I couldn't bare it!
But it was pretty scary I walked right out of my front door at 3 a.m. & disappeared for 24 hrs. because my brain was fried & I thought my family would be better off without me! I remember how painful & terrifying it really was especially being down on my knees praying in the street @ 3 a.m. I actually believed if I was "born again" it would help....

Please be careful! There's no shame in asking for help when you need it

Take care

There is a correlation between postpartum psychosis and bipolar disorder. See the review in The Clincal Journal of Psychiatry, November 2003.

I think it is sad that the media--in all forms--broadcasts bipolar disorder in it horrifying extremes--that is, when it even bothers to approach the subject; Extremes such as infanticide!!??? Of all the examples?? When the majority of us hurt ourselves more than anyone??

Yes I know there are loved ones, friends, family, divorcees etc who have been deeply wounded or scared by knowing someone or have been in a relationship with someone with the disease, but it is in no way shape or form an accurate comparison to the hell that we lucky ones face every day for the rest of our lives. THAT is what people do not get. Attatch all the STIGMA you want to the illness but survivors of bipolar disorder are everyday heros. And those who have fallen victim and yest I said VICTIM to it, well they deserve as much respect as anyone. Suicide is not 'checking out' it is a way to make the pain of all pains stop. Period. It is not the answer of course. The answer as the show today said is a) find a doctor that really cares b) therapy c)patience d) meds e) diligence and f)once you are level STAY ON YOUR MEDS!

I am 24 years old. I was diagnosed at 20 after I checked myself into a psych ward because I knew something was terribly wrong. I have been through hell since then but there is finally some light at the end of the tunnel. Yes I have been deserted by friends and family who do not understand but I (whith the help of a wonderful doctor) am back in college and taking things a day at a time. I am on eight medications and I hate taking them, but I wouldn't miss a dose for the world when I think of the alternatives. Such as being back in the hospital, more suicide attempts, snide remarks by doctors and EMS workers who see 'mental' patients as a waste of their time.

I despise not being able to be open about my illness because the STIGMA says 'crazy people should be locked up for good' We are NOT CRAZY. We are human beings. All shapes, sizes, colors, ages, nations--of all walks of life.

Oprah, what I would say to you is yea! yea! yea! for approaching such a sensitive and difficult topic (bipolar manifests itself different ways in different people--one reason it is so difficult to treat) on your show BUT next time and I would encourage a next time, please be more celebratory of those who have the illness. There are wonderful people who do wonderful, productive, creative things in this world. Writers, artists, actors, scientists, teachers, poets..you name it! Why not recognize some of the good deeds rather than focus on someone who has killed her child. My heart goes out to her but she is not a typical case. Her story only emphasizes what society FEARS about people with mental illness--that we are out of control, to be feared...'watch out for the crazy person and by no means let he/she get near your child!'

For those of you reading this and have bipolar disorder, I encourage you to TELL YOUR STORY no matter how much it hurts. SUPPORT NAMI. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF AND try to minimize the shame as it is only counterproductive to your healing process and! and! and! LET'S WORK TOGETHER TO GET EQUAL HEALTHCARE AND DISSOLVE THE STIGMA! We HAVE to start somewhere! Blessings to you all. You are NOT alone!

To evenstar23, Please go to a doctor and say the exact words that you wrote in your message. Then listen very carefully to what he or she says to you.

One of the best, user friendly books on helping people understand bipolar disorder is 'BIPOLAR DISORDER: A Guide for Patients and Families" by Francis Mark Mondimore, MD. I"ve read several books about bipolar disorder and this one is the best in terms of helping the average person understand the many facets of this terrible illness. Hope it helps.

After seeing an announcement on the subject of today's Oprah show, I was impressed that she would finally feature this topic of bipolar disorder. Its close to me in such an intimate way. But after the first five minutes, my reaction vacillated between shock, confusion, indignation and anger. As a person living with bipolar disorder, I was shocked that Oprah chose to single out this one, sensationalized story about a mother who killed her son - and who happened to also be diagnosed with a bipolar disorder. She opened the show with this attention-getter, added a watered-down, weak dialogue with the guilty party's "friends" and then briefly introduced Dr.Kay Jamison, THE bipolar expert who not only knows more about this disorder than anybody in the country but wrote one of the most compelling, dramatic and fascinating NY Times best-seller books (An Unquiet Mind) that I have ever read. In my heart of hearts, I wanted to believe Oprah had read it - but based on her knowledge base and uneasiness - I doubt she did. I also felt like Oprah was basically "tolerant" with the topic of this misunderstood, overhyped and under defined diagnosis. I am so sick of hearing it used for Hollywood drama and taken totally out context. As a woman, I have overcome tremendous obstacles and my diagnosis of bipolar disorder only makes my life's story all the more rich. We are all products of weaknesses turned to strengths when we choose to embrace difficulty. I imagined myself calling the show and saying, "Oprah, for almost one hour you made me feel...very ashamed. Something I never expected out of you. You USE to be on my "Safe Place" list. But, thankfully, you are NOT who defines me and I stand with the others on this board who know (and state) that it is ridiculous to focus on rage and the destruction of others as the primary symptoms of manic-depression. Too bad you didn't take the time to meet Kay Jamison before the show - it would have dispelled your prejudices and fears." After years of SELF destruction, I got help. Deep wells of despair, multiple hospitalizations and having to climb huge mountains have caused me to stand stable and whole. I have a fulfilling professional and private life; I am active in giving to others and I hold prestigious positions in my community. Heck, my psychiatrist calls me HER Hero. Most of us are people who can live happily ever after if you would stop shooting us down before we can even begin to heal. There is only one thing I'm depressed about right now and that's this show today.

Kate,
You are too kind - thanks. I will contact Lynn Price and I would LOVE a set of the books that will be available. How kind of you to offer. And if you know of anyone that was able to tape today's show that would be a big help.
Blessings to you,

Lynne
lynne@homesandhope.org

Would love to hear from you

Yes, it can cause a mother to kill her child. I have NEVER talked about this with anyone, EVER!!!! I would not give our baby baths when I was alone. I was afraid that I would push him into the water and hold him down. The same thing with cooking. I would not use the oven for fear that I would put him inside. No, I did not want to harm or kill my baby. I just believed that he was better off with GOD than with me as a mother because I was so messed up. This is real!! It is not an act or attention seeking. I prayed and carried our child for 9 months and labored for 32 hours why would I want to harm my innocent, helpless baby? It is the thoughts that race in your head and you really believe that sending them to GOD is the best place for them. I thank GOD that I had a supportive and loving husband that would come home when I told him I needed him to. I know that there are more people that experience these feelings but they are ashamed and afraid of people judging them. Until we can talk about this openly we are going to see a rise in mothers killing their children. Thank you Oprah for discussing this and please don't stop.

Today i cried all the way home from work. Bipolar Disorder/Disease is a horrible disease that if left untreated can turn into other mental illness. This disease is often over diagnosed or under diagnosed. My son age 21 was given the diagnosis at age 19, he would not accept the diagnosis, he said the mania was brought on by his use of meth. He continued to fight meth addiction and this disease. He joined the Navy against his parents wishes and on August 22 he attempted suicide. He was in a locked Psychiatric ward for 7 days. He was self medicating with alcohol---and the Psychiatrist diagnosed him with Bipolar 1 with rapid cycling. He is to be discharged and will return home in the next month. I am not looking forward to his return, he is a dual diagnosis, meaning he has a mental illness and addiction. 58% of people with Bipolar are addicted to drugs or alcohol---self medication.
Bipolar if untreated can cause schizophrenia, people begin to hear voices and see things that are not there.
Mental illness can cause a person to do many things, yet we must all be accoutable for our actions. I feel for this mother, my sister is bipolar and if she does not take her medication will have schizophrenic behavior.
REMEMBER people will come to your aide if your family member has cancer or a heart attack, yet they usually run the other way when your family member has a mental illness.
REMEMBER you are not alone

It so great to see episodes on Oprah that are real and that we all can relate to in some way. I just want to say thank you for this episode on Bipolar. I could relate to this show today on Bipolar because I used to have a friend who has it. My old friend had Bipolar, Depression and Social Anxiety Disorder. I mother that I know at my work set me up with her younger brother and we had lots in common. He lives in a different state than I do. We spoke on the phone all the time and even wrote to each other on
e-mail. Although I wrote my old friend the most on e-mail. My friend and I were supposed to meet but it never happen. Maybe that was because he had Social Anxiety Disorder or that he just couldn't committe to coming out to visiting me. About five months into the friendship my friend and I drifted apart after. I had found out he had Bipolar and depression. When I first got to know him he only told me he had Social Anxiety Disorder. I do miss all the good times I had while talking to my friend on the phone. He was a good guy, very smart, intelligent, loved school like me but his Bipolar and other problems got in the way of our friendship. I accepted him for who he was and I still do. I don't hate my old friend. He said something on e-mail to me once that concerned me right before friendship ended for good. He was threatening to kill himself if I wrote or spoke to him ever again. So I told his sister about it. She then suggested that him and I end the friendship. She didn't want to see me get hurt anymore. I know that my old friend never meant to hurt me. I feel as if God brought me my friend. For four months I had a wonderful friendship. My friendship with my old guy friend changed my life. My old friend and God made me realize things about myself that I never knew. I am glad that I got the chance to have a friendship with someone who changed my life. My friend had invited me to go visit him in his hometown. I never got that chance because our friendship ended. My friend was going to take me on a roller coaster. At first I was nervous about the idea but then I decided I would do it. I'm afraid of heights but I want to learn to concur my fears. My friend was the one who made me realize I wanted to concur my fears. Well the friendship ended but I still want to go on a roller coaster and I'm sticking to my word. Even though my friendship drifted apart, I still feel happy to this day. Certain things remind me of my friend but I don't hate those things. My friend got me to love hockey. He was a huge hockey fan. I will always like that sport and I still plan on watching it even though I don't have a friend to tell me all about the game. I felt like my friend had two sides to him. It wasn't untill after we drifted apart that I felt that way about him. My friend didn't seem like the guy that I first started getting to know. In the begining he was sweet and in the end he was depressed and in a black whole. It wasn't until after our friendship ended that I saw those signs and a few others. There was times in the friendship where my friend never spoke to me for a week. I never knew why he did that at first. My friend used to put himself down all the time when he was in a dark whole. I would read his away messages on AIM. Sometimes they were pretty mean. I felt bad but what could I do? I had a lot of good memories and I will always treasure them!!!

I believe the mother on the show never met to kill her child. I think she was in a depressive state and her Bipolar got in the way. I believe that when your not thinking straight that you do crazy things. That mother loved her child. She also was fighting an illness at the same time. She didn't even know that she had something truely wrong with her. I commend her friends for sticking by her. It takes guts to stick by a friend who has a serious illness. My old friend and I had to go our separate ways. At the end of our friendship I did everything to try and save it. I told him how I felt about him and how I thought he was a wonderful person. His mind was somewhere else. We may have gone our seperate ways but he will always be in my heart. I had an experience and I gained so much from that experience. My experience with my old friend was different compared to friendships that I've had in the past. I learned a lot in the friendship that I had and thank God for that. I also thank Oprah for airing this episode on Bipolar. I learned a lot. So thank you!!!

I was so glad to see the show today on bipolar disorder. I have been on and off of anti depressants for about 6 years. I have tried about 5 different kinds. Each would work for a little while then I would begin to feel as though I were in a fog, and still depressed. There has been an additional sympton that has arose since my 3 year old sons birth. The "RAGE" is what my husband calls it. I have uncontrolable fits of rage. I have never intentionally harmed my children, but I do find myself screaming, spanking, and grabbing them up to roughly. I just feel overwhelmed with parenting them. I have only recently had my thyroid gland taken out and am having a hard time getting my meds regulated for that, so I don't know if the hormonal changes with that may be contributing somewhat. The last antidepressant that I was on was Prozac, and it caused sexual side effects that weren't accepteable to me, so I quit taking that about 3 months ago. What do I tell my general practiononer? I hate to walk in the office and say "Hey I think I have bipolar dissorder" shouldn't he have suggested it by now? Do I go to anouther Dr? I have never seen a phychiatric Dr., whouldn't I need a referral from a general? If any one has any advice or suggestions for me my email is Joejennlemaitre@yahoo.com Thanks for airing the show Oprah

To Concerned Sister,

The answer is NO your brother does not have to stay on medication because it was most likely the medicatons were causing his bipolar, but coming off too rapidly can induce the mania as your mom describes in her letter.

My neighbor thought he was a Scotish Crown Prince for six months in his last manic episode. That was 12 years ago and he has not taken a medication since. He understood that his mania was antidepressant-induced. What he has done is used all natural products to calm down the seizure activity in his brain and avoid sugar and other high glycemic index foods which can trigger Bipolar. It is directly linked to blood sugar imbalances as evidenced in the cravings for alcohol. Noni juice is what brought my neighbor out of that six month long delusion. Since then he has used maybe 10 bottles - less than one per year to stay leveled out while watching his diet, avoiding all stimulants, and watching his sleep patterns.

And I will agree that from what I have seen that True Hope is a good product for Bipolar as well.

Drugs are NOT the answer to this disorder. They cut life short as research shows.

Dr.Ann Blake-Tracy, Executive Director, International Coalition for Drug Awareness