I am 32 a wife and a mum to 9 and a 3 years old boys. I have made so many mistakes by trying to do too much, streching myself too thin. Some of us have to work and some choose to stay at home. Whichever that works for your family, it is nearly impossible to think that you can do everything right as a mother. When my first boy was born, although, I was raised with other small children, I could not even hold him right. When he was around 7or 8months he was a strong boy and he fell out of my hands a few times or I did not check the milk before I gave it to them. But the most guilty was I had to work everyday and I think they were not taking care of properly in my abscence. 10 years later I was laid off my job, somewhat I was upset I could not provide for my family and my husband has been sick for the past few years and barely work and still does not take care of the boys. Sometimes it feels so depressing being a mother, but when I heard my children cry for me and run to me for a kiss or praying for me I feel the luckiest woman on earth and nothing could take tht away from me. I always wanted to have children and I feel it is a learning process just make sure you are making decision by putting your children needs first and by staying healthy. Praying is my guidance and reading the bible teach you the right way to raise your children to be responsible adult when they grow up.

It's not often I get a chance to watch the Oprah Winfrey show, but I was fortunate to catch this episode. As a single parent of two (my daughter is 21 recently married, and my son is 16) it was more of a struggle financially for me in raising my children. I have always viewed my situation as a blessing. If it weren't for my having children, I honestly don't know which direction my life would have taken me. I've never been married and I've been serving in the US Army all of my children's lives. I can't even begin to express the struggles in our life together as a family. My feeling is that motherhood and/or parenthood is the hardest job that you'll ever love.

I would like you to know that i had read threw your story and it was helpful to know that other mother's are going threw some of the same issues with there adult children as i don't feel so alone however i do not believe saying you only teach what you were taught growing up because i came from a very abusive childhood but yet did everything i could being married young and raising 3 children loved them and did everything a mother could do to protect , love and try to steer them in all the right directions of life as i have been raising my 2 grandchildren since birth as my 2 daughter's in there twenty's got pregnant while still living at home i have been raising children for the last 31 years as my daughter just got custody back last yr.after me raising her son and had full custody of him for 5 years,and i am still raising my 29 year old daughter 8 year old child because my daughters could not take responsibility's of raising and ending there freedom to care for there children but i have closed the door for them to grow up and experiance life with out my help as my youngest daughter is pregnant again and my door is closed i will raise no more grandchildren as i will take my grandson back as she tried to use him to get back at me as hard as it was raising him 7 years out of his 8 years of life i had to except i might never see him again till he gets older because i will not except her verbal abuse and putting my grandson in the middle its very hard but i had to back away as i am still raising my 8 year old granddaughter and its very hard i ask myself where did i go wrong for my daughter being so depended on me and uses the excuse to blame me for there drug use or because i i was not a good parent it worked for 8 years as they graduated from school i was always close with them and did everything i could to be that perfect mom did not drink or use drugs or never went out with out them but the guilt is over because in my heart i was the best i could be and i find that i'm sick of the excuses of why there not taking care of there children but i am sticking to my guns and not allowing them to ruin the time i have left in life i have no freedom or friends because of bring up a special needs grandson and my granddaughter as they are 3 months apart its time i live and reach for my dreams as i love my two beautiful grandchildren and would not give them up for the world if i need to continue to raise them till there adult ok but my grown children are on there own and i will not allow them to put any ore responsibility's on me!

I do not think that any one of these mothers doubt their love for their child! I cherish every moment with my children but I always wanted something better for them then what life had delivered to our doorstep. I don't think that questioning mothering techniques is a crime. Questioning means a willingness to grow and change.

I also have seen where a child has been born and yes they love that child BUT no they didn't realize what they got themselves into. Look at teenage pregnancy, women who may not have any role models for mothering, etc.

Also, things written here are written with analogies, metaphors, and such. Don't take it literally.

GEEZ have some empathy - this is a blog to let women vent and not feel so alone at times - it might even save someone......

This show was right on about motherhood! I just want to add that i tell all my friends who are experiencing a difficult time in their marriage is that kids change a marriage but you were a couple first!! Make it a point to have date night at least once a month. The stronger you are as a couple the better you will be as a family. Thank you!

Hi, I'm not a mom, but I came in on the middle of a comment about a mom on the show who," was letting the advertising on her blog, be the main household income of $25,000/mo..."

I need to know how she set this up. I'm disabled and it's getting harder and harder to do my part time library clerk job. Even getting into graduate school for my librarianship is looking monumental. I need a job that will work for me. Can you get me more information?

KidneyPt.

I am so glad to finally have someone see their children as a blessing in their lives not a curse!!!!!

We have five grown children and although live was busy, we see them everyday as a gift from God. Blessings in our lives. They have taught us many things about ourselves, shown us our own selfishness and short comings that we have become better people for it.

akjewel49 - I very much doubt that if ALL your children don't get along with you that it's all their fault. I mean if a mother doesn't get along with her child it's usually only one child NOT all of them. The fact that you don't get along with any of your children should tell you something was wrong with you as a parent . It can't be all their fault. Talk about your kids in a nicer way instead of calling them miserable, surly etc.

Oh Elaine, I am so sorry...I was married for 14 years and have 3 children ages 14,11 and 7. I was not a stay at home mom at the time but I do feel your pain and understand. Even tho I worked I ended up with nothing, living with my grandmother and starting over!!!!! Keep your head up it will be ok. I have been divorced for 2 years now and I am still starting over

Mother hood is the hardest job...EVER...actually being a parent is. No matter the books or studies or TV shows being a parent can not be described or summed up. If you think "you dont know" then you are naive.

This show really bothered me - I watched for a little and turned it off as a matter of fact. I am a single mom and my "baby" is almost 25. But as I watched the short time that I did - it brought back all the wonderful memories of raising my daughter. Introducing her to the "world" - sticking your feet in mud, jumping in a puddle, playing in the rain, blowing dandelion seeds......what I would give to be able to do it all over again. I am so very very sorry for the Mom's who see raising a child in a different light.

Surely all these women did not think it was going to be easy to raise children! I raised my kids during the "we can do it all and have it all" phase. I had 4 boys in 5 years and worked fulltime. I had no family close by to help and went through an army of babysitters......taking care of 4 boys was HARD!! I was the cub scout mom, volunteered in the classrooms and library, had many, many sleep-overs with multiple boys over, huge birthday bashes, great holiday celebrations.........the whole thing. We had a complete meal every single night, occasional take out and the kids had a bath every single night ..............and I showered every day.

Was I tired? Yep. Was my marriage perfect? Nope, far from it. Did we have a lot of money? Nope. Was I crazy busy all the time? Absolutely! I did not bond with my first son for many months and, yes, people thought that was a bit weird. But it happened eventually. My kids are mostly grown and I can look back and wonder how I did it. But at the time, it was just what you did! I didn't expect everyone else to do exactly what I was doing.............I set the bar pretty high for myself. My boys turned out pretty darn good, too, but there were plenty of doubts over the years.

What is with this exhaustion, both mental and physical with so many women? And did they REALLY think it was not going to be challenging???? Seriously???

I did not relate to any of the women on your show. I was married at the age of 34 and had 5 children at age of 35, 37, 39, 41, & 43. I worked until my 3rd child was born and then stayed home after that. I baked, cooked, sewed, canned, I helped with a neighborhood preschool, taught Sunday School, & primary classes at church. I took my 5 children to Disneyland, by myself :& on camping trips, trips back east to visit family. I am not saying everything was perfect but I didn't feel overwhelmed or have any of the problems they talked about on the show. I think there are more moms that are like me than what you had on your show. I went to the grocery store when the kids were in bed and their dad was home. I took them shopping for school clothes etc one at a time and we had lunch together after. We set up a co-op in our community to share babysitting so we could do these things. When I got married and had children I devoted myself to being a good mother. I kept in touch with friends but didn't feel the need to hang out with them. Have some well adjusted people on your show to balance things out.

Report from a Fetus

Observations messages & memories

Sir, report from a Fetus

from a Fetus?

Yes, sir.

what is in this report?

Observations of getting messages, the Fetus is.

what kind of messages?

Memories: important, good, safe.

what kind of important ones?

When you know & care, sir.

know & care about what?

Memories, sir.

And you know it-is-time for prayers.

what kind of prayers?

I'm not sure, sir. I think about the memories, sir.

And it is addressed To the Future,

From the One in your Womb.

from which one & womb?

I don't know, sir. I don't have a womb, sir.

This report is from a womb.

not do I know that I know of?

Not do I know that I know of, sir.

Revelation

From the One in your Womb

I jumped, too. ... Time told.

That's how I got Here, too.

Sometime you don't know

Until you get the messages-all-around

And you know it-is-time for prayers.

That's when the Memories start.

That's when you Know to Care.

Only keep the important ones

Remember the Good

The ones that keep you most Safe

To the Future

PS: Enjoy the time.

I related to the show somewhat, but on a different level.

When they placed my adopted son in my arms, he was seven-days-old and I was 39 ½. I fell in love with him immediately and still have not left Nursery Nirvana these 17 years later. I love being a mother and treasure every minute and memory of caring for my special needs child, who was born with cleft lip and palate, and whom we later discovered has several learning differences.

I have loved every minute of raising him. I have even enjoyed changing diapers! I have always felt that motherhood is an almost sacred duty - a long-awaited joy, which to this day leaves me breathless with awe that I have been given this fantastic job. My only disappointment is in the attitude of others.

To neighbors and people whom I believed to be friends, I am a second-class citizen because I am a stay-at-home-mom. My life is easy, no problems, no work. I should always be available to pick up other kids, and babysit at the drop of a hat. I remember one instance where I had Chris in isolation because he was going in for hard and soft palate closure. A mother became enraged with me because I would not babysit her two-year-old daughter who had a temperature of 103: the day care center would not take her. I, however, should be able to take the child so the mother could go to work. "You do nothing all day, while I earn a paycheck!" was her proclamation. When I protested that I could not expose my son to flu three days before surgery, she hung up on me. She has not spoken to me since. It has been 13 years.

When my son was eight, I was given the opportunity to co-author a novel. I had always wanted to write a book and decided to dive in. The house was still clean, meals were still cooked, my child was still well clothed, homework done, school attended, etc., but daily pressure was put upon me to quit writing and stop "stealing time away from the family."

The longer I worked on the novel, the more pressure was brought to bear. First I was told that the book would never be published. When I found a traditional publisher, I was told it would never succeed, when it hit the best seller list on Amazon, I was told to just stop. In the meantime, a children's book which I had written on my own when Chris was four, was published, hit the best seller list on Amazon and Amazon Japan and won an award.

Thankfully, I had shown that I could do both, but still it was not good enough. I didn't earn a lot of money. I didn't work outside of the home, so my worth was not the same as the principal bread winner in the family

My writing is important to me. I take six hours a day for myself to feed my passion. My son is still well fed, well clothed, and I am the manager of his band. Yet I am still made to feel inferior because I don't work in the corporate world and because I do this "thing" for myself.

Did I say, "made to feel inferior?" My bad - no, I don't feel inferior. I feel lucky that I have a husband who is able to give me the option of staying at at home to raise a beautiful child, and to be able to pursue my passion. But I am so very, very tired of those "friends" who try to make me feel that I'm not doing my part because I don't pull in a bi-weekly paycheck.

And, by the way, my son, has thrived. "Diagnosed" as incapable of learning at age three, I thumbed my nose at the person who handed down this detestable sentence and am now the incredibly proud mother of a published author and a budding poet, musician and chef.

Not bad for someone who was constantly "stealing time away from the family."