Oprah.com Community: producersh's Blog: Who out there is ready to simplify your life?

You know when you're watching The Oprah Winfrey Show...and you have a moment of clarity? That aha! moment, the lightbulb goes off, a shift in the way you see things from something Oprah or a guest says? Well... those of us working behind the scenes have those moments too!

Working on our "What Can You Live Without?" Experiment, was an eye-opener for me...and the rest of my team...it made us all want to simplify big time! We all started to think about what can we live without, what do we buy to make ourselves appear more successful to others, to appear more put together, more perfect...Oprah said it exactly in her "What I Know For Sure" article in March's "O" magazine..."Having the best things is no substitute for having the best life." The two moms who took our experiment were truly courageous...they dug deep to really look into their own hearts and minds to ask what were all the "things" they had surrounded themselves with about. Candice, the widowed mom who had been buying "things" to fill up herself and her family after the loss of her husband, touched a lot of you who watched the show. She told us after the show aired -- friends, family, and neighbors asked her why she hadn't told them sooner about her situation...and many thanked her for opening up about it -- because they saw themselves in her, and had been buying things they couldn't afford. (You can read their stories here if you missed them: http://www.oprah.com/slideshow/oprahshow/20090130_tows_livewithout)

I think if we all dig deep and are honest with ourselves, most of us will admit we do the same thing...

What did I need to look at? My obsession with beauty products...the latest, the greatest, they are all lining my bathroom shelves. Could I live without a lot of this? Of course! I've got a cleanser, a serum, a night cream, a toner, a day moisturizer with SPF, two kinds of eye cream (one for day and one for night)...seriously, I know this is over the top when I look at it from an outside perspective.

Where does some if it come from? Well, my mom was way ahead of her time in the wrinkle-fighting department. She always looked younger than her actual age...and any new article she read with a new solution for wrinkles...well, the product was in her cabinet. When she read that silk pillowcases helped because cotton pulled against your skin, guess what we both had the next week...that's right two silk pillowcases on both our beds! She started me on a eye-cream at 18 years old... Now you'll probably ask did this help, do I look my age? Is my skin glowing? I do get compliments on looking a little younger than my true age and having nice skin...and maybe that's why I've gone overboard on the products, because let's face it, we are bombarded with youth around every corner we turn and compliments make us feel good. But after this show, I think it's time for me to start putting that money to good use elsewhere and begin appreciating every line that is starting to appear on my face for what it represents...laughing so hard with my brothers I end up falling on the floor, making funny faces with my nephew, crying through a good girlie movie with my mom and supporting my best friend through a divorce. Those lines are about the moments and the experiences that make us who we are...so I'm going to try to embrace that while I put a four week ban on any new beauty products making it into my house. By the way, my mom was also ahead of her time on the sun exposure thing too...we always kept our faces out of the sun, or slathered with sunscreen when we did go out...so I'm guessing that had way more to do with our nice skin than the latest high-tech eye cream! Will I still love it when a co-worker of my younger brother says...so you're showing your younger sister around the office today? heck yes!! But at the same time, I'll remind myself when they are no longer saying those things, of something more important my mom said to me...be grateful for every single birthday you get to celebrate.

So what I want to know from all of you -- what could you live without for a week, two weeks, or a month? If you really look at your family and yourself -- what are you surrounding yourself with to keep you from connecting to your family and to what is important? What pledge do you want to make to simplify your life starting today? Tell me your story here: https://www.oprah.com/plugform.jsp?plugId=1249138

11 Comments

Comments

dilehmk

Mar 11, 2009 5:55 PM

Having parents, parent inlaws, and aunts and uncles who lived thru the depression days, they have been my husband and I greatest role models.Jan 2008, my husband lost his job of 23 years, due to dirty politics, we would of lost every thing, but we both are very thrifty, thank GOD , for wonderful role models.
Would not change any thing!!!!!

erikaitis

Mar 13, 2009 11:11 AM

Excellent questions. As much as I do spring cleaning and taking bags to the thrift store, I'm still cluttered. I do find I've been saying no thank you to offers of material things from my Mom who lives out of state more often now. And I know that I don't buy as much. If somehow I can declutter then maybe I won't be so "wanty".

shirahpenn

Mar 13, 2009 3:58 PM

What I have learned when finding myself living with less, is what really makes a difference to me. I have always been a schoolteacher, so I have never really had a LOT of money. When I retired I had a lump sum that allowed me to live a lifestyle where I traveled more and ate out more. Now that money is no longer available I am learning to live on our budget. My husband and I eat out less, buy fewer clothes and stay home more. We have gotten even closer being that we are together more. We are both retired. So what I can't live without is......my husband and our relationship/I would love to be on the Oprah show. Love Gramma Shirah I chose you to write to because of the adorable picture of the little girl.

ddcdahlias

Mar 13, 2009 10:00 PM

Talk about living with less... we are sooo lucky here in Canada and the USA. My 18yr old daughter just got back from Nairobi - where in the orphanage she worked at, they have nothing and never complain. I felt guilty for having any complaints when I have so much. We have alot to learn from the children of Kibera. My daughter misses those children but if I know her, she'll go back after or during university. I wish there was something more we could all do that would make a difference. When I think of what I couldn't live without, it's just about everything but love.
thankyou and if anyone does read this, could you say thankyou to Oprah for all her help that we see her do please? I think she should start a facebook of her own as this will be clogged up in no time. 'oprahbook'? Karen from Comox BC Canada

kdpartak

Mar 13, 2009 10:01 PM

I want simplicity so badly! My big problem is my husband, he won't let me get rid of anything! We talk about this, and he's just so attached to his stuff, and I just want s-p-a-c-e! Laughing. I'm sure I'm not alone and someday I will win this war with if the stuff stays or "when" it goes! And it will go! Kathy

ragillum

Mar 15, 2009 2:20 PM

I am ready to simplify my life! I was laid off my job of seven years in November 08'. I started out cutting back and now have completely cut out. I love shopping for clothing, shoes, handbags, costume jewelry, houseware decorations, etc... I now only purchase necessaities. I have cut my AT&T bill, cut off my satellite and am currently using a converter box only with no monthly fees. Yes, my closets are very packed. I have taken bags, bags & more bags & boxes to thrift stores as well. I am now going to try and take clothing to Spirit of Success. I have thrown alway tons of food and have gave alot away. When out and about I stopped at the grocery and didn't bother to look and see what I already had. I am a Avon Independent Rep., and need to organize my Avon business and all my paperwork. I do not have alot of storage space. I own a townhouse with no garage and have things that would normally be in a garage. No storage space!!!

lynnbray

Mar 16, 2009 5:56 PM

I was laid off 2 months ago. Before that happened I thought better of buying a new car. I have a 1997 Honda Accord. It was a Navy Blue and little dull from being over 10 years old so instead of a new car.. I opted to have it painted Metallic Black at MACCO for $363.00 including tax. My car looks brand new!! My insurance also is a little over $400.00 a year !!! .... YES $400.00 a year....SO... I'm glad I opted OUT for buying a NEW CAR... SUZY ORMAN ~~~I should get a STAR for that one!! I also took SUZE ORMANS ADVISE on paying off high interest rate credit cards. Although I only owe on 3 store credit cards a total $532.00. I will be paying them off and staying out of the stores, even though they intice me daily with coupon after coupon to spend. I do not need anything more in my closet... Only if I loose the 35 pounds that my doctor thinks I should lose, then maybe I can show up in the stores again..My new plan is to use the credit cards and pay the bill and not go back unless there is a -0- balance. I am making my life much simpler and my needs are more important than my wants... My wants will have to WAIT.. They may never be on my priority list again!!

selders

Mar 25, 2009 1:56 PM

I truly thank God for helping me understand what is "most important" at a very young age. At the age of 19, I lost my father and he was only 39 years old. Two years ago, I lost my mother, and she was just 49. I took a moment to really reflect on those things that were most important to me, and I try to live my life accordingly. I thought to myself, "When I am on my dying bed, what will matter most to me at that point?" I realized it would not be the house I lived in, the car I drove, the career I had, the latest purse I wore on my shoulder, but instead it would be how I spent my life and time in relation to my children and husband. I am a committed wife and stay-home mother of 3 children, and I do realize that they are indeed my most important investment. Through them, and their children, I live on forever! I experience so many other young adults my age who have so many "things" my are still experiencing hell and confusion in search for happiness. This is a great topic, and I am so happy to see that more of us are concentrating on what is really important!

pearlbeach

Mar 25, 2009 5:56 PM

What a great conscious raising show, for everyone! I¿d like to see a show using ¿greening your life¿ as well. I think it would be wonderful to have the ¿O¿ experts knock on doors and come in and show us how to ¿green¿. While I¿m a pretty savvy ¿greeny¿, I know there must be many more ways to green a home. I¿ve learned so much from the home experts already, but this would be exceptional and timely. There are so many different types of homes and they all need special things as well, they all have commonalties. Getting some creative, artistic and expert details on ¿Green Living¿ with life examples would be wonderful.

jenkhoury

Mar 26, 2009 6:46 PM

in response to: selders

I am so glad you wrote this. It reminded me that I should give thanks for being so lucky to be a stay-at-home mom of two. I often forget in the craziness of schedules and life and cleaning and schoolwork, etc. Thanks for reminding me what I will be thankful for on my deathbed!

idahobeth

Aug 5, 2009 1:41 PM

My life shouldn't get much more simplified! My possessions fit in a suitcase. When I left my husband, I took very little--just needed to get away. Then he abandoned or gave away all of our marital assets before the divorce was final--not that we had much anyway. I don't have much to look after and I feel pretty relaxed about it. I'm moving cross country to help my mom and live with her and my aunt. I'll look for a job and start over. It's not so bad. I've collected many interesting experiences and good friends and I'm content with those!