Hello Dear Friends,

Thank you to all the people who have contributed their gratitude comments, which made for a truly beautiful and inspiring reading. While reading the comments, I felt a wonderful surge of energy. I was reminded, this morning in the shower, of that energy, when the words of a song came into my mind, "...What the world needs now is love sweet love..." I truly feel that by voicing our gratitude, even for the simple things, we are scattering love around the world. Surely, by showing your gratitude, you have extended your love to me and to all the other readers. What a blessing you have bestowed upon us! I am grateful for your blessings and the love that we are spreading to make this world a better place...for what the world needs now is love sweet love...

With the completion of chapter eight, we have entered the timeless realm of love, which is inner space. It is a realm of consciousness that cannot be understood through the intellect. Words merely point to that state of consciousness, that stillness. The keys that open the doors to that omnipresence of Love are acceptance, awareness and feeling. Love is not a concept. Love is the felt oneness with the totality of Life. The key word here is "felt". Love or inner space can only be known through experiencing, through feeling it within. Out of that feeling, that connection, arises your true purpose - which is to love, to let love flow into everything you do. In other words, being the space for everything that arises.

Cielo1 writes, "...I read that you teach tai chi and yoga to release the trapped energy in the body. I love practicing yoga, and I would like to get some pointers on how to allow the energy to flow and grow still awareness during the positions."

Any movement, whether it is Yoga, Qi Gong, Tai' Chi, walking (preferably brisk), running, jogging, etc., moves and activates the flow of energy. However, any movement done without awareness (presence) is only an exercise of the physical body. Such exercise or movement is usually a means to an end. Movement (yoga, or other exercises), if practiced with present moment awareness, not only begins to release the stagnant energy within the body and activate the flow of chi (energy), but can also be a portal into stillness, into inner space. Your primary practice in yoga or any movement or exercise should be Presence. That is primary, and the movement is secondary. In other words, most of your attention should be turned inward. Become aware of your breathing, of sensations in the body (not just at the start of your practice, but throughout). Accept what is, be totally in the present moment, without labeling, judging, comparing or criticizing yourself or others. If thoughts arise, notice them; then return your attention to your breath and energy body.

This is what I teach in my Presence through Movement ^TM workshops and retreats: using the physical form - the body - in order to access the formless dimension within ourselves, the state of consciousness that is Presence. In addition, there are yoga poses designed to release the old accumulated emotional energy trapped within the connective tissues of the body. The Qi Gong helps to restore the original natural life energy within, and also stimulates and opens the body's energy channels. Combining the two modalities, Qi Gong and Yoga, into a Presence-infused movement brings about a harmonious synthesis of action and stillness.

Priyav73 asks for clarification on last week's session with Oprah and Eckhart regarding love, loss, attachment to the form and the light of consciousness shining through the form. Priyav73 asks, "...how does one cope with the loss of a loved one, I feel my attachment to the form of my father and uncle is real, not altogether created by my ego..."

Eckhart last session used the analogy, "...a person's life is like a tapestry, which consists of all kinds of things that one identifies with...when a great loss happens...a huge hole is left in the tapestry...and that is painful when you identify with the tapestry (the form)...behind the tapestry, there's a light that shines through...that's why you can even see your life (the tapestry)...without the light of consciousness, nothing would be...when you don't resist this hole that has suddenly appeared in the tapestry of your life...there is suddenly peace...peace comes when the emptiness that is left behind when a form has dissolved is not resisted internally." Eckhart also said, "...even in true love, there is usually a little bit of attachment to the form..." However, if the attachment is too strong, you will not be able to sense the light of consciousness. That is to say, your primary connection has then been with the physical form (the person) rather than the true essence of the individual, formless consciousness. As you mentioned, "I feel my attachment....is real..." Yes, the attachment is real. Sadness over a loss of a loved one is not suffering if the sadness is accepted completely. Suffering happens when we expect life to be something more and different than what it is in the present moment. When we let go of all expectations, there is peace. We cope with loss through non-resistance to what is. So when your sadness arises, you accept and feel it completely. Through the acceptance of what is, the light of consciousness shines through the empty space left behind by the form that has dissolved. Remember, all forms are impermanent; the love within your father, your uncle and yourself is eternal.

Dies w asks, "...I have currently started using a mantra meditation (via School of Philosophy). However, it seems to be contradictory to use a sound, the mantra, to 'arrive' at silence. It is called a 'vehicle to silence'. Could you give some advice on this?..."

Using a mantra allows your attention to become one pointed so that it doesn't get drawn into every thought that arises. In the same way, awareness of the breath or inner body is used to draw your attention away from the thinking mind so that the stillness within can be revealed. Therefore, the use of a technique or "vehicle" is fine; however, a time comes when we must leave the "vehicle" behind. A mantra (or any technique) can be helpful up to a point. At some stage, however, it needs to be dropped, otherwise it becomes an obstacle. When the mantra is dropped, only the stillness (pure consciousness) remains. The mantra has then served its purpose. Some people don't need a mantra. They go to the stillness directly. It depends on the individual.

Cielo1 writes, "...I really was stirred by this subject of the ever-changing nature of things. In the last weeks it has become so clear how there is always going to be 'something up', whether it is no money to pay bills, or kids are sick or I don't feel good about my body, or somebody else's drama comes to my attention, and this cycle might repeat itself or something else comes up. In a way this feels like an awakening from this idea that once some 'problem is resolved', money is made or I have the perfect body, or even once I reach a certain level of awakening 'things will be good'. Rather, I feel some kind of hopelessness in this realization. Do you have any insights in this?..."

To arrive at hopelessness, as you have, is good. Congratulations! It means you are awakening from the dream. The dream of what? Your life as you think it should be.

You have realized that there is no perfect life situation. The expectation of a "perfect life" is an illusion. This illusion is the cause of great suffering in people. Now you have become "dis-illusioned", which is surely a good thing. You can now stop looking for fulfillment where it cannot be found: in your life-situation, and realize that true fulfillment is already here when you align yourself internally with the present moment.

Dolphin773 says, "...In the beginning of labor I can be present and be with my breathing and in my body. Basically I can handle it and I feel at peace and I feel focused. But at the end of the labor usually in the last two hours I feel out of control with the pain. It is so intense I cannot accept it and I feel like I cannot go on anymore. Would you suggest I try an epidural this time for the last half of labor? I was thinking that maybe I simply need it to cut the pain in half I am hoping and help me get through that hard end part of the labor? Or do you have some other advice for me on how to cope with the last part of labor..."

Can you become aware of your own projection of the future? Your expectation, imagination and anticipation of the last two hours of childbirth, the so called intolerable pain, is causing your distress, anxiety and fear. Here is a true story about projecting into future events. I recall at one of the ten day silent retreats I attended, I shared a room with a woman who had asthma. When she slept, she made a gasping sound. The sound was so loud that it woke me up and kept me from sleeping. However, I decided that I would not complain, but use the intensely loud noise and sleepless nights as my spiritual practice. There were several meditation sittings throughout the day. However, there were two meditations that I would not attend because those were the hours that I slept, from 9:00 to 11:00 PM and 5:00 to 7:00 AM. During the rest of the night, I would lie awake in bed, cursing and trying to practice presence. Night after night this went on, until the second to last night of the ten day retreat. I was lying in bed, between 9:00 and 11:00 PM, desperately trying to fall asleep. My mind was racing with thoughts such as, "I'll never get any sleep tonight, I should have asked for another room, screw this spiritual practice crap, and so on." Suddenly, I realized that my thoughts were of the future. It was one of those aha moments, when I heard a thought, unlike the usual thoughts that were going through my head that night. It said, "How do you know that you won't get any sleep tonight? Maybe she won't be as loud or maybe you won't hear anything. Maybe you will sleep." The next thing I knew, I woke up the next morning in time to join my roommate and others for the 5:00 am meditation hour.

Does this mean you won't have any labor pain? I doubt it. However, the pain may not be as intense as you experienced last time. It's possible that you may ease through this child birthing experience, relatively speaking, without even asking for painkillers or an epidural. The point, however, is, nobody knows the future moment until it arrives. I do know, though, when I stopped projecting into the future and became present in the moment, my life situation wasn't anything that I had imagined (feared) it to be.

Regarding your experience, "...During labor I really felt sorry for myself and angry my husband didn't have this pain but that I had to alone feel this pain to give us both a child..." In that moment, I believe it is called "transition," women often feel intense pain, anger or some kind of emotional upset. I recall slapping my husband across the face. Only when that moment arrives, transition, will you know whether or not to relieve the pain of labor through continued breathing, drugs or an epidural. In your previous two childbirths, you managed without it. Remember, the saying, in ANE and last session's webinar class, "this too shall pass." Childbirth is such a beautiful and sacred experience. It was the birth (labor and all) of my child that started my deeper journey to God.

In closing, I am grateful for my beautiful view of the nearby forest, the sound of chirping outside my window as I write these words, and the golden silence between the intermittent song of the bird. I would like to leave you with these words that Eckhart said last webinar session, "Feel yourself as life, rather than a person. You are Life experiencing itself temporarily as this person."

Be well...be in peace...

Kim Eng

© 2008, Kim Eng

Hello Dear Friends,

Many of you are now going beyond a merely intellectual understanding of this teaching, and are realizing the meaning and reality of presence in your own experience. With the ending of chapter six and the beginning of chapter seven, we are entering into the space in which we are becoming free and are no longer identified with thoughts, emotions, painbody, ego. How do I know this? Because the first step has already been taken - that is the realization that you have a painbody and an ego.

It has taken many years for my painbody to dissolve. In fact, I still do not feel comfortable saying that my painbody has completely dissolved. Why? Because in my experience, the painbody can lay dormant for a long time, then suddenly become triggered through one of life's events (and there will always be challenging situations, illnesses, loss of home or job, deaths, unconscious people, etc.) and so we are once again tested. However, provided we have been practicing being present, I can assure you that in those moments when we are tested, after a long dormant period of the painbody, we find that we have gained enough awareness so that it is not able to take us over completely. In other words, there is now enough conscious presence in you to witness the painbody arise, without becoming identified with it, and watch it quickly dissolve.

Your only concern becomes, "Am I present in this moment?" By dropping any desires we have of dissolving the painbody "forever," we let go of time, past and future. That is to say, we become present and accept the form that this moment is taking; painbody, emotion, thought, or external situation. We stop trying to control our lives, our thoughts, our emotions, and our painbody. We become friendly with the present moment. By becoming friendly with the present moment, we accept what is, and in the acceptance of what is, a deeper perspective arises that enables us to perceive not only the form, (ego, painbody, external situation) but also the space in which the form arises. In other words, we are aware that we are aware. We are conscious.

Dtartist writes, "I have a conflict going on with my pain body...the anger I feel for having had the negative experiences in my life...for the abuse put upon me by my mother, for the things she never taught me, for the childhood I never had because I had to care for my brothers and never had a parent care for me...I am angry because my mother resented me and pretended she didn't...For not being taught that there was more to life than just survival..."

I don't know if you remember Eckhart saying in one of his seminar sessions, "no human being can act beyond their level of consciousness." Your mother acted according to the way in which her mind had become conditioned by her past. The things she did and the things she failed to do were an expression of her limitations as a human being. She was not spiritually awakened, and so she was unable to go beyond her limitations. When you recognize this, compassion arises and it becomes possible to forgive ("Forgive them for they know not what they do," to use the words of Jesus on the cross). It also becomes possible now to recognize your grievances as stories you have been telling yourself in your mind for many years. The stories are based on the illusion that your mother was conscious when in fact she was not. The emotional pain that you have been experiencing throughout your adult life concerning your childhood was in fact not created by what happened in your childhood, but by the thoughts that your mind produced about it. I believe it is possible for you now to step beyond all those stories, access the power of the present moment and accept the form that this moment takes without judgment and criticism.

Another one of your thoughts that keeps you stuck in negativity and dysfunction is this, "The unfortunate reality of life on this earth is that it is obscenely expensive and gets worse daily." Another sad story. The ego strengthens itself continuously through its negative judgments about life while the painbody feeds on all those thoughts. They are not the truth. What is the truth then? This moment is as it is. In the words of Eckhart, "I can make the Now into my friend or my enemy." Your mother was not conscious enough to choose, but you are. What's your choice?

By believing in the story and emotions, in other words, through your attachment to the story and emotions, the ego develops a "victim" role which then begins clouding your perception of the world, of others and yourself.

I recall a time in my awakening process, as much as I wanted awakening, I also wanted the pain. I clearly saw that there was a part of me that enjoyed feeling pain. As soon as I recognized that, of course the painbody began to dissolve.

Life has not passed you by and your suffering has not been in vain. Why not? Because it has brought you to this point where you are beginning to awaken. With this comes gratitude for the present moment. As you let go of negativity, you will soon begin to experience positive changes in your life situation.

Honeyluu asks, "What helps you stay present during conversations?"

Practice keeping some attention inward rather than giving all your attention to the world of form. In other words, feel your inner body, your breath, or the stillness within, while listening to others speak. This takes the focus away from your thoughts, judgments, labels, opinions, ideas, etc. You cannot truly listen if you are thinking. To truly listen requires still alert presence. That is to say, you become the space for what is arising. That space is unconditional love. In this love, true communication arises (which is listening with no thoughts and allowing the words to come from the space of still alert presence).

Halp337 writes, "I like your blogs, thank you. But I'm disappointed in your neutral comment about anti depressants..."

I do not advocate the use of anti-depressants or any other drugs. In fact, I believe that anti-depressants don't work in dissolving depression. In my blog last week, I had mentioned, "Using drugs, prescribed or non-prescribed, may ‘control the symptoms' of depression, but it does not deal with the underlying cause, the undissolved painbody." My answer was related directly to Mememe33's situation. She/he is currently on anti-depressants, experienced a painbody attack and dissolved it through simply becoming the aware presence. All this took place while on medication. Should she/he now immediately stop using anti-depressants? As you may know, an anti-depressant is an addictive substance and should not be withdrawn from the body abruptly. The stopping of such medication usually requires professional assistance which I recommended.

When you say, "...I wonder why NO spiritual teacher will ever admit they (anti-depressants) don't work..."

I cannot speak for other spiritual teachers, except Eckhart's last webinar session when Oprah asked him, "Does medication get in the way of using the painbody as fuel for enlightenment?" In which Eckhart replied, "To a large extent it does. There may be extreme cases when medication is necessary, and for people who are already on medication, it's certainly not advisable to go off without advice of a doctor..."

You were right in saying, "...I just think they (anti-depressants) are so common and so accepted...it's almost as if...those of us not on them are a minority." Eckhart said, "...not giving in to this culturally conditioned behavior that says whenever you feel discomfort inside yourself...immediately seek some external help in the form of a substance..." For decades, we have accepted the belief that prescription medication is a means of fixing our ailments, physical or psychological. This was our conditioning, and for many people, it still is. Does this mean we should fault them because of their unconsciousness? Any judgments, criticisms, opinions, ideas you have are thoughts. And those kinds of thoughts prevent us from understanding an individual's unique set of circumstances. Compassion arises when we let go of judgments. Every person while in the grip of the painbody has their own tolerance level to that pain. Some people, like yourself, "I still have depression and was recommended drugs, but I passed on it..." have enough awareness to accept such emotional pain, thus avoid taking medication, while others don't have that awareness yet and so do what they have been conditioned to do: take medication.

Sharenow writes, "...I found out that you have offered spiritual counseling, $95 per private session! And you are all booked up! The benefit from spiritual liberation is immeasurable. It is out-weighted well beyond all material costs.....what is your view about, in our modern world and mainly in the Western society, it turns all of the spiritual services and guidance (what used to be a free service) into business? What used to be donation-based has become more and more charge-based..."

I appreciate your concern here. The cost for some people may be unaffordable. I would not refuse any person for spiritual counseling, talks or teaching intensives because of money (this is limited to space availability). Also, a number of partial scholarships is usually available.

Perhaps, one day, money will no longer exist as a way of living and we won't need spiritual talks anymore because we will live and breathe the One Life, the Truth that "makes us free."

However, until that day comes, spiritual counselors, teachers, pastors, churches, offices, etc. need to pay their bills (rent, phone, hydro, insurance, staff, etc.). In the past, and still to a certain degree in some cultures, spiritual services and guidance are based on donations. In fact, the practice of paying tithes is very ancient. It goes as far back as Genesis in the Bible. As well, as you mentioned, "Eastern society Zen teachers and monks," spiritual temples and monasteries, are usually supported through donations by their members. In both western and eastern spiritual teachings it was customary that individuals and families would support their churches, temples, clergymen, monks, etc. through "tithing" ten percent of their gross yearly income. However, today, most temples and churches have a significant decline in members as well as income from tithing. With the higher costs in living, the average family is not able to tithe ten percent or perhaps even a lesser percentage of their income. As well, nowadays, many people are no longer members of one particular affiliation and may have more than one spiritual teacher. In those cases, tithing is not the most appropriate form of giving. Also many contemporary spiritual teachers are independent and have no source of income other than what they charge.

Both Cielo1 and Ammachi12 would like to know, beyond what Eckhart writes about, my view and observations of how to deal with the female menstruating painbody. Cielo1 says, "...I have experienced for years this great heaviness and negativity that takes over a week before menstruation starts..." and Ammachi12 said, "My difficulty is in being aware of the pain, but not getting caught up in the pain or letting it get to me psychologically..."

It's been several years since I have had any menses. However, having gone through menses, pregnancy and menopause, the changes that take place during this time happen on three levels: physical, emotional and spiritual. Chemical changes inside the body occur, which cause physical symptoms to arise such as bloating, cramping, nausea, migraines, hot flashes, etc. Chemical reactions also take place in the brain which then affects our thinking (usually negativity arises). Our emotions, of course, are directly connected to the body and mind, as well as the collective female painbody. Therefore, irritability, anger, etc. arise. What is difficult to remember while the changes in the body and mind are happening is that it is nothing personal.

The instant I stopped resisting the present moment, I became free of the painbody. In other words, when I had let go of my expectations that this moment should be different than what was actually happening, (i.e. the physical changes in the body, the changes in my thoughts, the change in my mood and emotions), all symptoms, physical, mental and emotional pain dissolved. I felt normal again. When I say "normal" I mean present, rather than the "unconscious normal."

The painbody of course feeds the ego, the very structure that lives on identification and separation. To rise above the female painbody, collective female unconsciousness, bring your attention into the body, by feeling the energy, sensations, created by emotions, thoughts. It is also important to stop identifying with all the labels, judgments, interpretations that may arise in the mind. Be the space, the unconditional love, for the arising painbody. In the full acceptance of what is, comes peace. Then the sensations experienced in the body become fuel for presence. I now feel gratitude and fulfillment in my experiences as a woman (menses, pregnancy and menopause); my role as a mother had provided an opportunity to demonstrate unconditional love; and now I feel the Goddess within, that is to say, the realization of my spiritual essence, who I really am, that lives and experiences itself through my female form.

Karcal1 writes, "I am an atheist, and while I am enjoying this book and trying to put the practices into my everyday life, everytime I read the word "g-d", it rubs me the wrong way and turns me off of the message..."

In one of the early webinar sessions both Eckhart and Oprah commented on the word God. Eckhart said he rarely uses the word God, because the word has been widely misused and misinterpreted. Instead he uses words like the formless, or consciousness, or Being. Those words do not create an image in our minds. Oprah, however, uses the word God. I also use the word God sometimes. However, there was a time when I refrained from using the word because it too rubbed me the wrong way. Until I realized the true meaning of God. God, consciousness, stillness, whatever the name, has no form. It is the timeless essence; the eternal now. "The Tao that can be named is not the true Tao", says the ancient Chinese book of wisdom, the Tao Te Ching.

Perhaps, the ideas you have of God, "...a man floating around in the sky with a bunch of rules to follow that if are not followed, one is punished and judged..." were once ideas put into you, but now you have the choice to let them go.

You asked, "...Can one not become enlightened without mentioning g-d and believing in g-d?..." Certainly one can. Buddhists, for example, never use the word God. God is not an idea, nor is God something to believe in. Both attachment and aversion to the word God can become a hindrance to realizing the reality behind that word. Enlightenment is feeling the God essence, the presence or stillness, within. Eckhart defined enlightenment in The Power of Now as, "...your natural state of felt oneness with Being."

In closing, I would like to leave you with some words that Eckhart said in the last session, "You are the awareness disguised as a person."

Be well...be in peace,

Kim Eng

© 2008, Kim Eng

Hello Everyone,

That was an amazing session! This is a significant chapter and phase in our awakening, as we recognize the ego in the form of the roles that we play. I am so grateful that I now have enough awareness to enjoy exposing the ego in me. It can be quite funny to watch. However, it wasn't always like that, of course. I used to be quite the ‘kicker and screamer' as I was undergoing my transformation into spiritual living. That is to say, moving from a strongly identified mind-based sense of self to living a life rooted in spirit. I had a lot of resistance and pain during the initial stages of recognizing my roles and disidentifying from them. I can only reassure you that it gets easier. It is the awareness that frees us from the ego and brings about the arising of a new world (a new earth). As Eckhart puts it, "The world can only change from within."

We are undergoing a transformation. As the caterpillar sheds its shell before transforming into a butterfly, we are peeling back the ego's protective layers that have become our prison and are preventing us from living our true purpose. By becoming, as Eckhart says, "The space for whatever is arising" we begin to dissolve the many faces of the ego. However, as our awareness grows and as we become more conscious of our old conditioning, we may also begin feeling the pain of our past, unconscious actions. Many people fear going through the emotional pain that was created by our unconsciousness, so they resist it which then creates even more pain and suffering. Guilt arises when you identify with past unconsciousness, and this is one way in which the ego may try to return. Yet, there is nothing to fear as we undergo this transformation, "...though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me...," Psalms 23:4. Death, of course, refers to either physical or psychological death (the ego). Once the ego diminishes, we will of course, as Eckhart said last Monday, "find the balance between human and Being."

This is about balancing our functions, roles (human) in society, such as mother, father, wife, husband, doctor, lawyer, cashier clerk, street cleaner, etc., and the dimension of Being which is the God essence in us. Each half which contains a segment of the other, i.e. yin and yang symbol, cannot be separated. When we become separate from human and being, we live out of balance, therefore suffer. Many of us, for thousands of years, have ignored our true essence. That is to say, we had become ignorant of our true self; in so doing we have lived our lives creating misery and suffering in our search for fulfillment and happiness.

Is it then possible to "Be" and still function in society? Smtan04 asked, "...PLEASE HELP WITH AN UNFINISHED QUESTION FROM LAST NIGHT'S WEBINAR....Eckhart was about to answer a very important question that many were waiting to hear....Oprah had asked him how he introduced himself to others without using roles or labels...."

The more we become aware of who we really are, who we are not falls away by itself. The egoic need to see yourself as either superior or inferior towards others is no longer there. Instead of identification with the roles that we play, we attend to our functions of the moment, mother, teacher, lawyer, etc. without making an identity out of them. For example, when I am counseling or teaching others spiritually, my function is that of a teacher, counselor. However, the moment I cease counseling or teaching, I am "nobody." In other words, I'm back to "Being." This doesn't mean that I stop "Being" when I am teaching and counseling. In fact, my function inherently arises out the depth of Being (stillness), which is the true source of all answers.

On many occasions when asked, "What do you do?" I would answer, "I'd prefer not to talk about this right now. I would much rather ‘just be with you.'" Some people obviously felt uncomfortable with this, and there would be an awkward moment of silence. I would then practice "being the space" for the uncomfortableness or silence. One could say, I was practicing being with the unknown and allowing for whatever to arise in the moment. Sometimes it happened that there was then a noticeable sense of relief in the other person, followed by an authentic interaction between two human beings.

Seeker0612 asked, "....I have been explaining to my 5 yr old daughter that her negative thoughts are separate from her, and coming from a place we call the ego. She really seems to get it...she asked me yesterday "mommy, does my ego love me". It was such a sweet question, and I want to answer it correctly, and age appropriately. Any guidance would be appreciated..."

If your daughter has an understanding of the term ‘ego,' I would suggest you may try saying something like this: "Honey, the ego is not the real you, so how can the ego truly love you? Only the ‘real' you can truly love you."

Sdf926 asks for clarification on "Collective Grievances" (pg 65, ANE) and Botokx has similar questions that are related to our current time, grievances with the situation between Tibet and China, the collapse of the Soviet Union.

Passive resistance or non-resistance is based on the recognition that no problem can be solved on the level of consciousness that created the problem in the first place (I believe Carl Jung said that).

The collapse of Soviet communism happened from within, not through an outside force (which would have kept it alive much longer). As Eckhart points out in A New Earth, it was the collapse of a collective egoic mind structure, a monolithic thought form that people no longer believed in.

As long as a grievance is held in the mind (personal or collective), the ego remains in place and the cycle of conflict continues. If grievances are relinquished, the unconscious cycle is broken. But, as Eckhart points out, they can only be relinquished if you recognize unconsciousness for what it is rather than make it into somebody's identity. When watching an interview with the Dalai Lama I was amazed to see that he holds no grievance towards the Chinese. (What a relief because I am of Chinese descent!). In my view, if Tibetan monks continue practicing mindfulness and meditation, there is a good chance that real change will come about. I recently read that already there is a small but increasing number of Chinese people who travel to Tibet for spiritual guidance. Tibet has the potential of being the place where a spiritual rebirth of China begins.

Perhaps non-resistance is not the answer in each and every case. I don't know. But I do know this: if you feel that you have to fight for a cause, fight with peace in your heart.

Jam828 asks, "how do you deal with family members especially if you don't want to participate in old egoic patterns of relating but want to spend time with them?... how do I protect my children from unconsciousness?"

I love the saying of Ram Das, "If you think you are so enlightened, go spend a week with your parents." Are you rooted enough in awareness so that you do not participate in the old egoic patterns? When you are the awareness, you are the space for unconditional love and acceptance even for unconscious family members. Eckhart said something like this: "Allow others to be where they are. Do not demand that a person change. Change does not come about in others by trying to get them to change. Give the other person complete acceptance."

How are we to protect our children from unconsciousness? We cannot fully protect our children from unconscious behavior. However, we can give them the means to deal with unconsciousness in others as well as in themselves. The best way of teaching this is to live it yourself. Your state of consciousness will be their greatest teacher. Oprah had said it in another way: "Children pick up your energy. Energy is the child's language." The words you use to communicate and teach are secondary.

Toni5859 asks for clarification regarding Eckhart's description of "What is commonly called "falling in love" is in most cases an intensification of egoic wanting and needing. You become addicted to another person, or rather to your image of that person. It has nothing to do with true love, which contains no wanting whatsoever." Pg. 88.

Can we agree that real "Love" has no opposite? Can we also agree that the term "falling in love" has its reverse that is "falling out of love"? When the ego thinks of love, there is a need, unconscious of course, for the other person to complete who I am or rather who I think I am. In other words, what I perceive to be lacking in myself, I need you to fulfill.

I could best answer by relating my own personal experience. Prior to entering into a relationship with Eckhart, I was single and feeling happy and conscious. I had often heard that Life gives you exactly what you need to awaken. And for me, a relationship is what I needed to awaken even more. Because shortly after entering into the relationship with Eckhart, I became aware of all my expectations of what a relationship "should look and be like." At first, I tried to place those expectations onto him, as well as myself, internally demanding that they be fulfilled. Suddenly, I realized that I was not having a real relationship. Rather, I was having a "relationship with an idea" in my head.

With the concept of "relationship" come expectations, memories of past relationships, and further personally and culturally conditioned mental concepts of what a relationship should be. I had learnt that with each idea, expectation, I had about a "relationship," I suffered. When I became free of my ideas of relationship, there was peace. A sense of lightness began to flow within the relationship and within myself. Finally, deep within myself, I understood that there are no relationships. There is only the present moment, and in the moment there is only relating. This, I would say, is true love, true relationship.

If you would like to read more about true love and relationships, go to eckharttolle.com, click on news, click on interviews, scroll to "Relationships - True Love and the Transcendence of Duality." This is an article I wrote based on an interview with Eckhart.

Last Monday's session, Eckhart said, "Dogs are more connected with Being." Therefore, in closing, I leave you with these words taken from a cartoon: two boys and a dog are lying on the grass, daydreaming. One boy says, "I think I'm going to be a doctor when I grow up." The other boy says, "I think I'm going to be an astronaut." The dog says, "I think I'm going to be a dog."

Be well...be in peace,

Kim Eng

© 2008, Kim Eng