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kim_eng's Blog

by kim_eng

Trusting the Unknown

Posted on Mar 5, 2008


Hello Everyone!!


Wow! That was an incredible session the other night, Monday March 3. I love that so many spirits/people were gathered together, at one moment in time, around the globe. On an energetic and unseen level, every person had connected their thread of consciousness to the whole, thus weaving a band of possibility for a shift into a higher consciousness for the planet. In the words of Jesus, "when two or more are gathered, I am in their midst." And as Oprah said, "God cannot be contained in a church." We are the one consciousness, communicating, first through stillness, secondly through words, to eventually create heaven, which is peace, on earth. But, as Eckhart said, "it all begins with the individual."


We are awakening now. How do I know that? Because you logged in for that first session with Oprah and Eckhart. People have often expressed to me their desire to awaken just as Eckhart had in one swift night. I can only tell you, for most of us, it doesn't happen that way. For most people it is a gradual awakening. There is nothing wrong with gradual, only the mind will tell you otherwise, as the mind is never satisfied with what is. Accept the present moment fully and you are awake. As soon as you identify again with every thought that arises, you have gone back to sleep, spiritually speaking. The underlying awareness, the I Am that is deeper than your thoughts, has become covered up.



For those of you who are not familiar with my background. I am Eckhart's partner in life and in work, taking his teaching around the world. My role has been and to some extent still is one of "behind the scene support." However, as awareness has grown, I have also begun to do spiritual counseling and teaching. To put it more accurately, it is the awareness that does the counseling and teaching, not the person called Kim.


Many profound spiritual experiences have been part of my awakening. I would like to briefly tell you about one such experience, which happened during one of my annual trips in India. I was staying in a town at the foot of the holy mountain Arunachala in South East India, and I would often spend my mornings meditating in a small cave half way up the mountain. One morning, as I was meditating, I heard an inner voice (which felt very different from the usual thoughts that would go through my head) saying to me, "There are two things that you need to do when you return home. One, do not go back to the work you are doing. Two, you are to move out of the place where you live." Then, poof...the voice was gone! When I got home two months later, I had almost forgotten about the voice. Shortly after my return, my employer called and asked me to come back to work. (They wanted to renew my contract, which had expired). Suddenly, I was surprised to hear myself say, "No thank you. I won't be coming back." It felt as if I was watching myself from some other dimension. Then the memory of what I had experienced in the cave came rushing back to me. Over the following month, I was like an outside observer, watching myself go through the motions of packing and moving boxes, furniture and other household items. Since I had no idea where I would move to, occasionally fear arose. After I moved out, I found myself with very little money, no job and no home. Friends of mine put me up temporarily. Then one day, out of the blue, Eckhart (whose book The Power of Now had just been published) asked me to help him with his work. In that moment, I realized why I had to leave my home and job. I was being called to trust and live my life in God. I had to leave my past behind and trust in the unknown. I had to be ready and open for a totally new life situation. I remembered that Jesus had said something like, "Do not worry what you shall eat, what you shall wear, even what you shall say, for in the moment that you need them, it shall be given."


Prior and after this experience, I had many others. However, I now know that no experience in itself is all that important. The experience comes and goes. In the past, I sometimes tried to hold on to such an experience and even make it into part of my identity. I now know that the experiences themselves are not ultimately what matters. What is it then that is ultimately important? Present moment awareness. That is the inner space out of which all experiences come and into which they return. As Eckhart puts it, "You are not what happens, but the space in which it happens."


Knowing yourself as that space is inner peace.


Be well...be in peace,

Kim Eng

85 Comments
Comments

Hi Kim, thank you for sharing your experience, there are many individuals out here, searching and seeking. All this material is food for our souls, ummy yummy stuff. There is so much on the menu to look at. And we can select that which is correct for our well being. The jentle guidance and love comes forth, and for myself I AM elated. Real words to describe how you were able to transform and move forward. Trusting and carrying thru to what you earnestly seeked within your own being. Blessings to you and all those sending out the message. The dark seas of unconciousness - receding Set sail into a new horizon Winds of change shore to shore We are the people of this world Can you hear it in the wind that oh so soft caress In your heart of hearts open the door Knock and the door shall be opened Seek and ye shall find thank you all for helping others gain sight into their own beingness Blessings and love Ellen

Hi, Kim, My name is Kathleen. I am 69 years old and do my best to follow a spiritual path (I am learning, but have certainly not mastered being rather than doing.) I appreciate Mr. Tolle's sharing one's purpose in life is to connect with Consciousness(God). I have carried a life long battle, so to speak, within. I can become fearful over relationships (50 year marriage, four children, 14 grandchildren with whom relationships are good. Their life's work makes visits infrequent.) Living in the moment has been pure blessing. This morning, however, I lived in what ifs and was able to finally release. Next step will be accept during that process. At this age, my husband's and my life is one of lots of leisure and I have yet to 'hear' that voice call me to a purpose. (I have temporary physical limitations ie herneated disc.) I am sincerly hoping that simply inviting God into my life, on a daily basis, is enough. I do receive "responses", and still wonder, Is this enough? I thank you for sharing your call to make a change. I don't know if I would ever have the courage to simply pick up and move??? Blessing...Kathleen

My name is Terri. I know this experience is where I need to be right now. For a few months now I have felt uneasiness, a desire to move, a change underway. It almost feels like the anticipation when you are going to give birth, but without the pain. When I close my eyes I can actually see myself, my life on the other side of the experience. When Oprah announced the book, I thought "pay attention." I knew it was the path I had to follow. I fill my life with thought and activities to shut out the craziness. As a traumatically abused child I learned to dissociate. Kim, your words help me realize that those experiences are not who I am. My awakening began almost 20 years ago at a particularly dark point in my life. It's pretty much been moving VERY slow since then. At that time, I was neither religious or spritual. One night I woke up and in the darkness moved into my living room. I sat on my couch trying to figure out where my life had gone so wrong. I was very distraut. Then I decided to focus on the good things in my life, which I thought were few. I had a beautiful 3 month old son, I had food to eat, I had a roof over my head... I closed my eyes and became very still then a small pin prick of light appeared. It was a small hole in the darkness but generated magnificant light. I was awash in the light and it was wonderful. I would say a voice spoke to me but it was more like an awarenes I had. I knew in that moment three things: that I was perfect just as I was; I was no longer afraid of death because I had seen where the soul goes in death and it was beautiful; and God put many different paths in place to Him - there was not "right" religion. I wanted more but was "told" that I got everything I needed. I opened my eyes and no time had passed. 20 yers later and I continue my journey.

Kim... What a delight, a short message and only two comments to read! The sheer volume of postings on the other pages of this web site overwhelms me. Totally. My comment responds to your observation of yourself as playing a supportive role in Eckhart's work. I see myself as a behind the scenes person but have been thrown into leadership roles routinely throughout my life. Each time I have accepted such a role I have experienced stress, judged myself harshly and ultimately withdrawn with the perception of (self imposed) failure because the organization or project I led did not manifest the VISION THAT I HAD SEEN for it. I wish to cease being defined by these experiences and step unencumbered into the next role life offers me. I trust that Eckhart's book and my participation in this study will be a stepping stone. Thanks for your blog and my opportunity to put this wish into words. - Judy

Hello Kim, I am so grateful to you for sharing the story of how you courageously left your job, packed up and moved from your home, even before you knew the purpose behind it. As I am reading Eckert Tolle's book, A New Earth, and beginning the path to awakening, I now have a clearer sense of the driving force that compelled me to finally make the decision to leave my job almost a year ago. At the time there were parts of me that questioned "are you really sure?" to which the answer was always a resounding YES. Even then, without knowing it, I was on the journey to my awakening. Several months passed and I repeatedly questioned that decision and why, despite being well qualified, I have had no success finding a new job. But now, finally, I see that it has all been orchestrated by a deeper consciousness in order to put me on the path to my true purpose, and to release all the negative, destructive patterns that had been pulling me into a downward spiral for nearly all my life. I am extremely excited by how this insight brought on by reading A New Earth is bringing about changes in me that I never thought possible. Although I have not found a job and I'm not sure when it will happen, I am encouraged that it will come and I have no fear that I will have to go without. I am more clear than ever that at this point in my life, my purpose is to take the desperately needed journey into my true self and reveal all that God has purposed for me in my life. My journey is not complete, but I now know that I am on the right path. Thanks for sharing your insight.

I was really looking forward to reading behind-the-scenes with you, Kim, and was so glad to see your posting today. You two are like a modern-day Rumi and Shams! My heart is full of gladness. Here, have some! Maureen

Hi Kim, Loved reading your Blog! Keep 'em coming! Thanks, Karin

Kim...Namaste Thank you for your soothing post. I am going to make it a point to check out your blog on a daily basis as part of my change.

Hello, I enjoyed reading your experience. I am anxiously awaiting my aha moment and my life's purpose. After watching my niece come into this world and holding a friend as she died, I know for sure, there is a greater being. I believe my lifes experiences are the ground work for something fabulous and will pull all these questions into one answer. Thank You to Eckhart,Oprah and yourself for bringing this exciting experience to the world! Nikki

Kim, It's Cathy (Vandana) in San Diego. I can't remember when I first met you...I think it was your first visit to Tiru. You and beloved (departed) Leela were roomates at the ashram? It was years ago...I've been going annually since 1996 and have known Eckhart since the "old days" at Maha Yoga and the Inner Directions Gatherings. Please give him my best regards...he was always so kind to me. I can't tell you (and don't need to tell you...you KNOW) how amazing this is! When Eckhart and Oprah "highfived" each other at the end of the session I cried and cried...How beautiful this all is. What more to say other than WOW! I won't miss a minute of it. love to you both. XX00

"You are not what happens, but the space in which it happens!" AHA! Kim thank you for Being more and Human less. I totally understand.... Much blessings to you!!!

Hi Kim .. Reading your blog was like a breath of fresh air. AND all the positive responses that are coming on this page is so so so delightful!!! Eckhart's Teaching have made such a huge difference already. I love the way your wrote with such openness and trust. Thank YOU for sharing your experience. What a wonderful time to be alive!!! THANK YOU ECKHART!!!! and KIM!!!! AND OPRAH for getting this out to world.

Hello Kim and EveryOne. I appreciate your comment that identifying with my thoughts causes me to go back to sleep spiritually. My awakening flows with eb and flow. Since I have periods of awakeness and sleep state. I have full trust in Consciousness to gently remind me that I have fallen asleep. It reminds me that It(Conscioness) is always present waitng patiently and lovingly for when I am ready to wake back up.

Kim you are such an amazing soul! we are neighbors here in beautiful Vancouver..and would like to meet you in person I find that the words you spoke of resonates with my spirit and that's how I live my every day moment with awareness, love and gratitude. Truly the experiences are not important but the space that we live and the times of our present moment is what we have. I had an out of body eperience last 2 yrs ago after doing a yoga Bikram session that night and that change my whole perception of time-space reality. My consciousness lies in my spirit not in my body and mind how awesome to know that this world and form thatI have now is an illusion but the truth is my eternal self who is living in this physical self that I have. my email address is mystic_angel15@hotmail.com if you can spare a moment of your time so I can connect to you. I live in Burnaby area and been here for 22 yrs, used to live in LA when I was a teen and found myself moving here. Have 4 children and currently interested in writing a book.

thank you for that awesome post, Kim! I have to admit that its really easy for me to get hung up on the "experience" instead of honoring the simple fact that if I am conscious of this moment now, then I am awake now.

Lovely. Just lovely.

Kia Ora from New Zealand Kim. Thank you sooo much for your lovely blog. Your title resounded with me, as the biggest gift in class for me was the quote from Eckhart and Oprah of deciding to serve life as opposed to taking from life... and that takes a leap of faith in that you trust that life will give you what it needs... very much a turning point for me, a huge aha moment! Much happiness in your journey Enjoy Vanessa

Hi Kim, Wow! I have to tell you I have been in a state of absolute and amazement for the past 3 days since watching the webcast on Monday night. I have dedicated my life to God on July 4, 2000. I'd been living in NYC, was successfully working in publishing in marketing, i was the office darling and had been working comfortably for 10 years ... but there was this nagging feeling in me that I was "missing" something. It was like a memory, or like I forget something, or some piece of the puzzle was missing and I couldn't see the whole. Words escape me. The underlying feeling was: THIS IS NOT LIFE. I was making good money, had all the appearance of success but I started to get logical and think things like: ok, so I'll probably make some more money, get more promotions, travel, get older, and then die. I could see my whole life played out before my eyes and it literally didn't make any sense to me. Work and work and work and work, to have a few fun moments, and a few weeks of vacation, meanwhile getting older and then dying in the end??????? This can't be life. It kept repeating itself over and over in my mind: this can't be life. But it was like I was trapped, and couldn't find the escape door. So I stood in my living room on July 4, 2000 and said: God, if you are there, I'm working for you now. You're my new boss. AND THEN six days later, on July 10, 2000 I was fired!!!!!! i am laughing as I type. I was laughing as they fired me. It was so funny. It was such a good moment. I knew I'd been hired by God!!! It's been a great adventure. I write a blog called Gorgeous for God which "inspires people to be as God created them ... perfect." It's based on A Course in Miracles. I loved everything Eckhart said. I sat there mesmerized and a little bit incredulous. The reason is because a few years ago it was given to me to see this world is an illusion. My family thinks I'm crazy. They humor me - like, okay, that's Lisa. She's a little crazy - she says this is a dream - but really, she's harmless. Just a little delusional. I've been saying for years this world is an illusion. I was given a glimpse and a nudge and my life is completely different but my family is always trying to reason with me that the world is real and solid. So, the other night I'm watching Eckhart say: "there is no death" and "this world is an illusion" and talking about self-responsibility and I have to tell you: I've never seen anything like it. I was laughing out loud. I was so happy. ON NATIONAL TELEVISION. This is monumental and huge. And Oprah sitting there shaking her head, yes, yes, yes. This is a brand new moment. This really is a global shift. I never thought I'd see this in my lifetime. I am so grateful. I'm happy you are blogging. Keep up the amazing work. i have bookmarked this page, and look forward to reading more. I loved the story of the voice in the cave telling you to leave your job and living space. Ha. Amazing. Love, lisa

Absolutely delightful.

I very much appreciate what you and Eckhart are doing to help awaken humanity; it seems like you have jump-started the process. I have one comment and it is not meant to be confrontational. You stated that most people should not expect a sudden awakening like Eckhart did, but rather a gradual awakening over time. Over the years I have observed and also experienced that a sudden awakening event is a very profound thing. I wonder if the gradual approach reaches that type of profound place at its conclusion. The gradual approach may take a lifetime (especially if it is self-guided) while a sudden awakening can happen in the span of a day. It is not surprising that the shorter path would be preferred. I know from first-hand observation that some have found a way to the sudden awakening event. With any luck I will be able to discuss it with Eckhart when Chapter 9 finally arrives.

I am getting so confused by the names in the book. Why is God call consciousness? Presence for Spirit? Please clarify... Thanks

Hi Kim, thank you for sharing, I don't fell there are people around me I can talk about these kinds for spiritual events. I have had my inner voice coming to me, the lastest one was a couple weeks ago, I received a call to take an interview, so I thought I would go and see what they have to offer. It was scheduled for the Thursday night at 8:30, at my present job, my superintendent asked me to attend a meeting schedule for the same night, but was at 7:00, it would be an hour long, so I felt I could do both, well the day before I received an email, my work meeting was changed to 8:00, no way I could make both, but this was the first time I felt the respect at my work, It felt my inner voice was telling me You are where you need to be, I felt the time change was a God given message. I felt it was by god the meeting times were changed. I have been reading the New Earth, I watched the video with Eckard and Oprah, The excitement I'm feeling I can't help but share it with the people around me. The decision making has seem to be easy, I got it, "take the I out of the situations" What a difference. thanks so much to all that share

Why are we so worried about our human species survival as a form, if we are not the form? Evolution can be what it can be. It may take a form,not take a form or take whatever form it evolves into.Why are we concerned about that, if we are beings?

Inspirational indeed. Uplifting. I personally believe the world on a grand scale is in a dire need of achieving peace. Ultimate peace in life, around the world, begins in each and every one us individually. Spreading the message of peace, and how to attain it through Mr. Tolle's and Kim's methods, is our duty as a humanity that is deteriorating as I see it. Thanks for the blog Kim!

It is good to have a dialogs about spirituality and how to become more spiritual, God knows we are very much material and in need of material things, as we know it. To keep the right balance and take all in moderation and modesty could prolong our existence. We kill so many animals for food and plants for consumption and pleasure, we need to be thankful and forgiving. Maybe we can learn to live with in our means ie planet Earth, as species.

First of all Great Blog, Kim. Very soothing as someone else said. Secondly I am glad someone else has brought this up. Isn't our greatest enemy fear. Doesn't the Bible say "perfect love casts out fear" I too have wondered if the ideas and methods discussed here can become another " religion" in twenty years because ultimately there is a fear base to it.

Hello Kim...looking forward to read your blog every week and the comments of my others classmates. Should be very interesting to discover, has the weeks go by, the teachings of Eckhart...What a great adventure! I live in Canada (Québec City), and I'm so thrilled to think that at the same time, on Monday nights, I , buried in alot of snow, will share with people from all over the world, a teaching to be Awaken to make this planet a 'New Earth'. How fantastic is that! What a community! I'm so happy to know that so many of us have a commun goal and be spiritually uplifted throught Eckart knowledge...Thank You! Also, Thanks to Miss Oprah that through Her passion in wanting to share in Her enlightenment, She enlighten's all of us. Through Her will, all of this is happening...ALLELUIAH!!! Miss Oprah!

Wow Kim, Thank you for your post. How nice to see that you have joined the board. I was watching the Sounds True webcast this evening, and I must say, no matter how much I hear the words (pointers) it's always extremely helpful to me. For Oprah to be doing this class with Eckhart, and making the teachings so accessible, is a real gift. Blessings to All.

Hi Kim, thanks for your post. Isn't it wonderful how we can use these boards to reach so many souls. I guess I had a similar experience. For me it all happened instantly. More that 10 years ago I had a sudden realization that everything happens for a reason and a peaceful feeling came to me, all of the worries did not matter. I refer to it like switching on a light. One click of the switch and I was lighter, all of my burdens were gone. What a feeling. I was going through a stressful divorce with a young child and so many things were in turmoil. I stayed in that bliss for some days and it is true, once you reach that point in your life you can never go back and I have always kept the inner peace. So many things have happened in my life over the next 10 years and although I was peaceful on the inside, something was missing, I tried to find that perfection that I knew was there until now, until reading Eckharts book. It changed me again (this brings me to tears) His way of presenting the ego is what has made the difference for me. I have always been able to separate the ego, always peering at the situation outside myself but never able to put my finger quite on what was missing. I lived thinking the balance was the answer, the ying yang. What I thought was you can't have one without the other and so I accepted or dealt with the bad as well as the good but Eckhart's way of presenting the ego has switched that light on again and seeing the illusion makes it dissolve. Words cannot discribe the feeling. Thanks Kim for sharing and thanks to Eckhart and Oprah for their shift towards "A New Earth." Enjoy the journey. Beebalm46

Hello Kathleen. My name is Barbara, and I'm 66. We have perhaps a more urgent need to connect with Consciousness at our age - no? I have been struggling with this for 30 years now, when I first became aware of a "knowing" that there is something else. I first read this book when it was published in 2005, but after watching the webcast the other night, I realize I have spent too much time thinking about spirituality, and not enough time being. I have become too caught up in my personal dramas - family, work, problems, relationships, and too often feel overwhelmed and despondent. Thanks to Oprah and Eckhart, I now have a renewed strength to continue the "struggle", to concentrate more on being, not thinking. Doing was probably never my problem as much as thinking. Eckhart, Oprah and Kim are truly a blessing, as are you for reaching out to us all. Thank you.