The
Diary of a Not ALWAYS Desperate Housewife





WARNING: Reader discretion is advised. Contains violence, nudity and coarse
language. Not to mention whining,
nagging and excessive sharing. Oh yeah -
and poetry.



This is a true story. Well, at least 93.14159265 % true. Any resemblance to actual persons living or
dead is entirely intentional.





Weighing
Heavily





This is the diary of a not ALWAYS desperate
housewife



Who led an overindulged and yet incomplete
life



For decades the entire universe spun around
my weight



As I fought a hopeless battle against my
pudgy fate



Until the day Dr. Phil said it was not
about what I was eating but about what was eating me



And Oprah said write it all down in your
journal to set yourself free



They were right because letting my world
weigh so heavily on my mind



Had only served to increase the size of my
behind



So just like Darwin I set out on a journey of discovery



To understand the evolution of my misery



Now I get it and can feel and say anything I
dare



And am shopping exclusively for size small
underwear