'Success is not something to be flippant about because it can easily go away. It is so much about timing. ~ Leonardo Dicaprio

Oh I just thought this quote was so good. It seems as though we are always chasing success and its nice to be reminded that its important to be humble and grateful for all that we have right now. Have a wonderful day everyone....up next.....

Could it be that the more the concept of 'restrictive diets' and 'mindless exercise' is seen as a viable 'solution' for weight management, the more 'other' causes will be found to account for the failure of plans, that are based on 'restrictive diets' and 'mindless exercises'?

Let's look at the long list of 'other' causes over the past 20 years:

Hereditary: You have no control over your weight problem, because it's just who you are.

Big Bones: It's not that you are overweight, you just have big bones.

Baby Fat: It's baby fact you were born with

Thyroid Problem: You have no control over your weight problem, because it's your thyroid.

Slow Metabolism: It's not you, it's your 'metabolism' that's the problem. As if your metabolism is an individual organ.

Depression: It's not you, it's an illness, caused by you not being happy, about your weight problem.

Eating Disorder: It's not you, it's your body craving food.

Bad Relationships: It's not you, it's your relationships with other people that's causing your weight gain.

Have you noticed how many more 'other' causes the 'experts' come up with for your continued weight gain, and inability to balance your weight, no matter how much you starve yourself, or expend your energy doing mindless 'exercising'??

Do you think this 'path' of other causes will ever lead to a solution to help you balance your weight, or just lead to more 'other' causes that are 'out of your control'?

Do you really think starting 'another' diet plan tied to restricting foods you love and mindless exercise that you hate, will ever work long term. No matter how many times you start, end, restart, end that same diet plan, no matter what name you give it?

Do you really, really think that if you lost any weight buying and eating nutrient/calorie restricting prepackaged food products, that you will be able to keep it of, if you don't continue to buy that nutrient/calorie restricting repackaged food products for the rest of your life?

Do you really have time to go to meetings for the rest of your life to talk about the foods you eat and a never ending attempt to lose weight?

After you have asked yourself those questions, ask yourself a few more important questions BEFORE starting another diet plan:

1. What happened when your previous diet plans ended? Did you gain the weight back and more?

2. What do you think will be different when this NEW diet plan ends? (see question above)

So how about a different plan, so you can have a different result? Take a moment to read the posts on this blog about Thinking in Balance, Eating in Balance and Moving in Balance, that come from the book 'Perfect Body 4 YOU', and maybe you can start to RETHINK your ideas around Balancing your Weight for a Lifetime, before restarting yet another diet plan.

Wishing You Wellness.

In 2008 my sister Randy's husband left after 18 years of marriage. He left her and my niece and nephew. I decided I will let go of the

anger and pain, maybe take it one step further and forgive. We'll see.

i met a guy last year......we spent some time together became intimate and he backed off, stopped calling as often, never initiated an invite to go out or go over to his house, i had to initiate the question. sometimes he wanted to most times he said he just didn't want to do anything. we had breakfast, we had dinner, most times at his house with me footing the bill. he would get irritated when i initiated a conversation about our relationship, which had not been defined after 5 months. i became very frustrated and emotional. he just did not want to have a conversation about us. when we did talk it was an argument about how we don't spend enough time with each other to get to know each other. talkin on the phone is not a good tool to get to know someone.. well i struggled with this for an entire year. with him saying he care about me a lot but not really showing me he cared because we didnt spend that much time together. he says i wanted to move too fast, i said i just wanted to hang out with him without a television to get to know him. i wanted to go out and have some fun.

he said he just want to have fun. well once he told me he did not like being around me because i made him feel weird, he said i always wanted to talk about a relationship, which was not the case. he once had sex with me and told me the next day , "that will never happen again" he wanted to get me out of his system". talk about hurtful.. he says there is no one else, but i felt like there was someone else because when his phone rang he would either not answer or go into the other room, he says he is friends with his ex's, ex-wife, ex friends, that made me feel uncomfortable and very paranoid and suspicious. which explained a lot of my emotional instability, when i tried to express my feelings to him, he said i was over reacting or made me feel like i was unbalanced..

the day before thanks giving, he was headed to his grandmother's funeral, we got into yet another argument because he told me he would call me and he didn't, which he would do quite often, i know my timing was bad and it seemed very inconsiderate but i was so angry and got very emotional, i told him i don't deserve to be treated like this and told him that i do not want to talk him anymore.

after him calling and calling and me not answering the phone i was just so hurt, he called again and left a message saying" you will never leave me because you love me just as much as i love you", now i took that as an I Love you. well , a month go by and i don't see him, we talk on the phone and when i bring up what he says he gets very irritated and says he regrets saying it because i am just dragging it into the ground, why cant i just leave it be.

well, of course that hurts me, but i let it go, and ask why havent i seen him in a month, he says well you know abscence make the heart grow fonder...that didn't sit well with me, so on last week i asked him to lunch to talk, to let some things out to get on track, he agreed, when i got to his place he hardly acknowledged my presence, told me to have a seat and basically we ate and watched tv, i told him we needed to talk but of course he dismissed it with the tv program. after some small talk and one hour going by he said he had to be back to work.

well i felt duped, i was very angry and cursed him out over a text. well new years eve we talk, but he says he does not feel like talkin, so we hung up... well i asked him to be honest with me and asked him if he really loved me, did he mean it. he responded, yes he loved me but as a friend.......that hurts to no end, first of all, no one has ever told me that they loved me and secondly he lied. but why.

well a new year is here and i am trying to go into it without any angry feelings, so i told him that i forgive him for everything that has happened and apologized for my part in what ever it was we had that went wrong. i told him even though he didn't apologize i still forgive him, his response was apologize for what.

was he there? was he completely abscent in this thing we had?

the problem is for some reason i cant explain, i love this guy, i fell in love with him the moment we first kissed, he shared the same feelings, he didnt tell me he loved me at the time and i didn't tell him i loved him but we both felt a connection.

i said i would move on and we can be friends but honestly i dont think i can. he said it was up to me. does he not care?

signed

confused , lonely and broken hearted

'

There comes a time when you have to look at yourself, honestly. We can blame our situation, our circumstances and everyone else for what is not going right in our lives but we have to take time out to see what is our part in our own mess. Because memo to self, it is your mess. You have to live within your own situation and handle the reality of your own world. No one else.
Did you ever realize that no one inherently gets happy when you do? If you make a million dollars today, that's your victory, no one elses. Just like your decision to get up and wash up is your decision and everything you do from that point forward, so is your happiness.
You are responsible for the decisions you make it.
You can ask other people for their opinions, validation, praise, or two cents, but at the end of the day, you have to live with what you decide.
Know what is in your best interest.
Do things to build yourself up versus tear yourself down.
Stop making poor decisions out of fear.
Do you realize that you can spend a lifetime inviting in the wrong people into your life and doing all the right things to make other people happy simply to belong, fit in, and please other people?
The time for people pleasing, and self abuse is over.
It is time for you to live your life to its fullest.
Your circle is already complete whether or not you have another person in the room with you.
You have with you at all times the presence of the holy spirit and god and jesus with you by calling on them in prayer.
You are not alone.
So stop inviting people into your world to fill up space and to stop feeling lonely.
Analyze your circle and see if you have people in your life who genuinely care about you and are building you up.
If you have people in your life who are constantly tearing you down, wearing out your self esteem and never seem to be happy for you, time to have a friendship divorce. Pack their bags and tell them to go. Party over.
Life is too short for you to be surround be negative, dead people.
Instead, invest the time that you were giving to those people to yourself and your prayer life with god. Become your number one fan, friend, and confidant. You are a good person and deserve only good things. Settle for nothing less in this year.
Stay blessed!
: )
Lady Charmaine Day

JAYZ will be performing at the Warner Theatre on January 19, 2009. He isn't performing at the Inauguration. Yes I'm a Jayz fan. I hope he keeps his pants pulled up! LOL!

Realized the panic attacks and fear won't stop unless I acknowledge it and then do something. The something for now is asking "what is the worst thing that can happen?" And then answering "who knows, you aren't there yet, and last I checked can't tell the future." Brings me back to the moment and the panic and fear seems to subside.