Illustration: Ping Zhu

“This act [of blowing out birthday candles]...is a vile one.... from now on supply yourself with a snuffer.” —Manners for Millions, 1950

“It is good to cast colde water in the face of him that hath the hiccups.” —Regiment of Lyfe, 1553

“Spend no time in reading, much less Writing.” —Advice to a Son, 1656

“Excitement of the sexual system is a necessary consequence of the...glances lovers bestow upon each other [and is] injurious to the nervous system if [it occurs] frequently.” —The Mother’s Guide and Daughter’s Friend, 1890

“Never hug and kiss them, never let them sit in your lap. If you must, kiss them once on the forehead when they say goodnight. Shake hands with them in the morning.” —Psychological Care of Infant and Child, 1928

“Almost anything you like can be rolled in bacon, oven- or pan-broiled, and served on picks.” —500 Tasty Snacks: Ideas for Entertaining, 1949

 “Duck and cover.”—1950s safety  strategy for nuclear attack

“Don’t appear to...surpass your husband in intelligence....keep him in the dominant position to help him feel needed and adequate as the leader.” —Fascinating Womanhood, 1963

“Love means never having to say you’re sorry.” —Love Story, 1970

“The solution to substandard performance is always to excoriate, punish, and shame the child.” —Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, 2011