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The Number One Thing to Look for in a Partner

By Karen Salmansohn
Looking for a partner
Photo: © Jupiterimages Corporation

Are you prioritizing finding a partner who is sexy, smart, charismatic, successful-in-their-field right now? If so, Charles Manson, Ted Bundy and Mussolini fit your bill—but trust me, that doesn't mean you should date or marry them.

In my book Prince Harming Syndrome, I share an article from The New York Times about the psychology of evil which included "The Psychopath Checklist." Criminal psychiatrists use this helpful list use to test the potential of someone being a hardcore psychopath, capable of committing repeated evil and violent crimes.

  • Guess which traits psychopaths share?
  • Glibness
  • Extreme charisma
  • Need to always be doing something
  • Feelings of high self-worth
  • Pathological lying
  • Proneness to boredom
  • Emotional unavailability

To my amusement, all these adjectives also described my now ex-Prince Harming boyfriend, who was an adorably charismatic, fun, active, confident guy. But in the end, he turned out to be a two-faced cheater.

The importance of good character values