Makeover Madness

By Martha Beck

Making the Change

Change your story.
Most people run a nonstop mental monologue highlighting their physical shortcomings while ignoring their pleasing attributes. For the rest of this day, each time you mentally criticize something about your face or body, you must also find something to praise. You don't have to believe the praise, just force yourself to say it. Self-talk has a subtle but profound effect on your demeanor and presentation of self. It paves the way for the next strategy.

Change your comparisons.
Once you've made room for a little positive inner dialogue, put your rational mind to work accepting your appearance. In particular, stop evaluating yourself in comparison to the "50 Most Beautiful People" lists in magazines. Such comparisons make no statistical sense. If you come in at 51, beating out seven billion people, you'll still consider yourself a loser.

Instead, consider that fairy-tale heroines, invariably described as the "most beautiful maiden in the kingdom," lived in teensy prehistoric kingdoms, some of which boasted as few as 150 citizens. Only 75 would've been female, and many of those were too old, young or experienced to be considered maidens. In other words, Snow White was competing with about 35 other chicks.

Next time you're at the mall, instead of comparing yourself to Gap posters, count 35 women at random. Ask yourself how many of them you'd really, truly want to see in your own mirror. Most of us are in the great big relatively attractive middle. Now doesn't that feel better?